Monday, 14 May 2007

Huge update, Arthur, crafts, and other stuff

Waaaay too long since my last update here! I’m writing this in Word because I doubt I’ll get it all written tonight, since it’s late and I’m tired out, and I have just resized NINETY-NINE photos – oh my gosh, I never want to resize another photo again! Not even one. Urgh! My head hurts and my “clicking” arm feels all shaky! I thought that brought me up to date, having resized everything that was saved to Arthur’s 29-month photo file and Matthew’s 10-month one, but then I discovered that HALF of all the photos in Matthew’s 9-month one haven’t been resized. *sigh* But I’m NOT doing them now! I just need to start updating my diaries. I have half an entry saved in Word for my pregnancy diary too. Tsk. I just want to get them posted, but then I get side-tracked or it gets toooo crazy late, or a boy wakes a lot, or something. I should finish the pregnancy diary one since it’s already started, but I just want to get some of these photos posted and update in general on the boys and stuff. I’m getting TOO behind here! I am also a bit behind on other people’s diaries. Hopefully I can catch up quite quickly though, but I’ve been rubbish at commenting on diaries lately.

Now I’m here, I don’t know where to start! I guess I’ll pick up wherever I left off last entry….

STILL no news on my new baby niecey-nephew! Last time I spoke to Bennie was Friday (41 weeks exactly, urgh!), and I spoke to him 3 times that day as they were having all sorts of issues and wanted my advice (which felt wonderful!!). Sarah had absolutely zero signs of impending labour at all by 41 weeks, not even a tiny bit of crampiness or anything. She’s pretty uncomfy and can’t go out for walks at all anymore due to hip pain, etc. I KNOW how hard it is to reach 41 weeks. It’s SUCH blessing to have a baby, and be pregnant, even huuugely pregnant! But 41 weeks does mostly suck, if I’m honest. Poor Sarah! She’s being ever so cheerful about it though! I phoned them in the morning, and they had a midwife coming to their home in the afternoon to do the 41-week appt. So later I got this phone call from Bennie. He is THE most laid-back person I know, and he sounded really stressed and unhappy so I was worried. They had had an idiotic midwife round who had stressed them out, and Sarah’s blood pressure was high when she finally took it, so they had to go to hospital and have it monitored for a while. Of course it was okay and they got sent home. She also barged in with her student without asking if that was okay with them (it wasn’t, they specified that on their birth plan/notes) and then blocked Bennie with their backs while they talked at Sarah. Sarah’s iron count is low and so she smartly informed her that it was below the cutoff (by like 0.2 points!!!) for homebirth, and that was that. No homebirth! They asked all sorts of questions about iron and supplementation and whether there were ways round it and stuff, but she just kept brushing them off without actually seeming to know the answers. It made me sooooooooo mad listening to him tell me about it! Midwives should be SENSITIVE at all times, in every possible way. It should be like, part 2 of their job requirement – part one: Know the stuff. Part two: Treat women with great sensitivity. Hasn’t this woman ever read Sensitive Midwifery?!?! Okay, rubbish link, because I can’t find a decent place, but anyway, it was THE first book I ever read on midwifery, and it won me instantly. I mean, I started applying for midwifery courses. When I got accepted on a midwifery degree course, one of the books on the compulsory reading list (and there were only a few) for BEFORE you started the course, was Sensitive Midwifery! So I’m highly peeved at this daft woman, stressing out her patients so badly and not at ALL adhering to the important doo-dahs described in this book.

So by the time Bennie phoned, they’d had a difficult day, and Sarah was very upset still, and they didn’t know what to do or think. It always makes my heart just swell with joy to be a “big sister” at times like this. I love being called upon to help make things better! It reminds me of the time I shut a boy from my brother’s class in the girls’ toilets for picking on my little brother, haha! ;) But that isn’t exclusive to family, it’s something I just love. It gives me such a great feeling of purpose and it’s rewarding.

Anyway. Poor Bennie and Sarah!! Sarah had her cervix checked for progress and there was basically none (at 41 weeks!), and she wasn’t even a candidate for a sweep. The midwife did one anyway (though not sore HOW if she only scored 1 on the Bishop’s score thingy?!), but yeah, it doesn’t look good for a baby any time soon. The hospital they are booked with (which they’re still hoping to avoid!) lets you go to 42 weeks before induction, which is pretty good, as far as hospitals go. Mine was 40 weeks + 10 days. So they have another week. After that they can still refuse, and we talked about that for a while. I had an induction booked with Matthew (who was born at 41 weeks) but I had ever intention of cancelling it when it came to the day. It’s SO stressy to have to deal with that though. Urgh.

I sent Bennie to Homebirth.org.uk, which is FAB – all this stuff is way more relevant to my pregnancy diary isn’t it?! But it’s sort of general updatey news on Sarah, so… Anyway. It covers basically every reason you might be told you CAN’T have your baby at home, and then looks at research that says why that’s a load of rollocks. Including low iron! I told Bennie to read the stuff there, make sure they had all the information they needed about Sarah’s blood count to make an informed decision, and then DISREGARD everything the midwife said. Like, put it away and try to de-stress as though she had not said all those things. The staff at the hospital gave Sarah NHS iron tablets, and later in the evening after the boys were in bed, I read the page I’d directed Bennie to, and it mentioned those as being cheap and nasty (good for diarrhoea, constipation, and nausea, and NOT good for being well absorbed!) so I phoned them back and Bennie said everything was SO much better. He had read the bit about the NHS iron tablets and had already been out to buy some easily absorbed stuff from Boots, along with some orange juice to help Sarah absorb it well – what a lovely boy (except of course my baby brother is now a grown man and NOT a boy, but I’m in denial ;) ).

Also they checked the blood report and found that Sarah’s something-or-other count was smack dab in the middle of the normal range, which actually means that her iron levels are normal, just well diluted because of the increased blood volume of pregnancy. Tsk. I’m so annoyed about ignorant people stressing out the people that I love!

So the next thing they have is a big hospital appt on Monday (41 weeks and 3 days). They have a scan to see if the baby/placenta is doing okay, and another cervix check and sweep, and more blood tests to see if her iron is improving. And probably a huge battle over getting induced. *sigh* That’s tomorrow, and Bennie said to phone after the appt, which is in the morning, for an update. I don’t expect anything has happened because Sarah didn’t seem to be ready for labour yet a couple of days ago. But I hope it’s soon for them! I hope they don’t end up being pressurised and stressed.

So that’s the long-and-drawn-out update on the baby niecey-nephew! I hope he/she is doing okay in there! I can’t wait to meet him/her (but let’s face it – HER. I have such a vibe!). I will update here as soon as there’s news!!! So exciting!

Well, I have sooooooo much to write about the boys and things. I’m sure I won’t have time to update about it tonight. Maybe I’ll post this when I can’t do any more, or maybe I’ll save it here and finish it tomorrow? I feel like I am endlessly behind on my record of Arthur’s development. I caught up a bit with Matthew’s, although he’s changing all the time! That’s the thing – they keep changing all the time, so just when I feel like I’ve caught up, they go and do a ton of new things! ;)

I’m trying to think of words to describe Arthur, for a sort of “at a glance” type of thing! He is always busy. He never stops talking. Ever. He is serious and funny all in the same moment, and has a cheeky sense of humour. He is incredibly communicative, not just with his talking but in what he chooses to communicate to us, and how. He is sociable and confident. Other mums have described him to me as “gregarious”, and that’s spot on for Arthur. He is non-stop but (thankfully!) distractable, because he is just so interested in everything. At church today, I was breastfeeding Matthew in the crèche room after the service had finished, and the lady who was running crèche said to me how Arthur has the kind of energy that would end up making many toddlers the “destructive” type. He’s into everything, and he’s especially instinctively drawn to things he really shouldn’t touch (uncovered plugs at church, locks, latches, wires, etc), and he does things at double speed all the time. He has boundless energy. But the lady said that the difference with Arthur is that he’s just SO interested in things, and he has a long attention span, which is helpful!

Arthur loves trains and cars. He spends accumulative hours each day pushing cars around the floor and furniture and lining them up, and parking them, and having them wait at traffic lights and in traffic jams. He does the same with his Thomas the Tank trains (his HUGE set from Christmas). Those crash a lot and require some engine or other (usually Terrence) to come to the rescue! ;) We don’t have a ride-on toy for him in the house at the moment, because there is just NO space, but he’s made his own up anyway. He spends huge chunks of the day just riding on an upturned clear plastic box from the toy unit! He sits on it and shoves himself around the carpet with his feet, chatting constantly to himself (and anyone else who will listen), telling me he’s going shopping, or parking the car, or driving home, or – well, endless things. He just loves cars right now! He still loves Thomas the Tank Engine, but it’s playing with the cars and stuff that he loves the most, rather than watching it. He knows the theme song all the way through and sings every word. He sings a lot now, and surprises me all the time by singing words to songs I didn’t know he knew! But ALL his singing is completely flat, haha! I don’t know why. Neil and I sing well, and in tune, so I don’t know why he’s so off-key, hehe!

Let’s see, what else does Arthur do these days? He watches too much TV. Urgh. I know I need to work on that. I am currently working on a proper routine for my day, which will obviously mean the kids’ days too. It’s ME who is too disorganised to do stuff, and then there’s stuff that HAS to be done, or a moment when Arthur needs distracting, and the TV is on a lot. I hate that it is. I do NOT plan for it to stay this way, but I know I need a working plan first. I am working on it! Of course, because the TV is on, Matthew is watching more TV than a baby under one EVER should, ugh. There are a couple of occasions in the day where the TV is actually reeeally useful even for Matthew though: nappy changes – a total nightmare at the moment! Matthew won’t keep still or lie on his back, and it’s nigh on impossible to change him. When there’s a pooey nappy it’s BAD bad news, so I heart my TV then. He has favourite things on TV, which I feel kind of ashamed to admit, but knowing his favourites means that I can put those on and I can actually change his nappy. It makes a huge difference! His absolute favourite is Thomas the Tank Engine, wouldn’t you know?! He gets highly excited and squeals and bangs the table with his hands, and actually watches it intently for a long time (for a little tiny one), like most of a 10-minute episode. This is also the choice when I am in a critical stage of cooking the family meal (what we call our early evening meal with all four of us at the table), and Matthew goes into clingy meltdown mode. Thomas to the rescue! ;) He also likes Teletubbies, Razzledazzle, and Boogie Beebies, but the latter is mostly about the music and dancing. He dances eagerly to that, with a big beaming smile on his face, looking over his shoulder constantly for my approval. He’s the cutest pie! :) Anyway. Too much TV in this house for tiny people. Must sort it out.

Anyway, back to Arthur! He seems so tall to me this week. I wonder if he’s been growing? He still breastfeeds as much as ever before. I still turn down requests several times a day, when it’s too near to a meal time or I just nursed what feels like 376 small boys during the course of the morning, to the extent that my nipples just HURT! That does happen sometimes. Both the boys breastfeed quite a lot still (each boy 5+ times a day and Matthew at least a couple of times at night), and neither has the best latch in the world (especially Matthew!). I’m probably as tough as old leather by now though (!!) and don’t find it uncomfortable a lot of the time. I completely LOVE it anyway! Matthew is 11 months old today (wha?!?!!) and so I have a new breastfeeding milestone blinkie for him over there on the left :) My TRUE breastfeeding milestone thus far is now 30 months!!! Arthur was 30 months old last week, which makes him exactly 2½!! So I have been breastfeeding for 2½ years continually! Yay me! :) Matthew’s 11 months is a great achievement by itself but it feels ever so small against the length of time I’ve been breastfeeding his brother! I am kind of proud of myself :)

We are STILL persevering over the eating issues. *sigh* I lose count but I think it’s something like 11 weeks and counting. He still won’t eat my cooking, and we don’t give him anything else if he doesn’t. He does get offered pudding as part of the meal, and sometimes he eats that. It depends what it is. He has eaten a few tiny bits of meals that I make, but only if it’s like baked beans or something. The doctor recently recommended serving him his jarred toddler food (which of course he will devour happily!), say spaghetti bolognese, mixed with a tiny bit of MY spag bol when we eat that as a family. She suggested letting him see us mix it in, and then gradually make the quantities more my cooking than the jar. But we don’t eat spaghetti bolognese every day (!) so it’s going to take ages to see that through, and that’s only ONE meal! We’ve served it to him twice like that, and he’s mostly getting the jar while we eat “real” spaghetti bolognese. But he eats it all up. Other than that he doesn’t eat. He eats sandwiches for lunch (picky about contents) and all the usual bits and pieces still, like yoghurts, raisins, apple, raw carrot, peas, sweetcorn, cereal bars, etc. He does eat normal cereal with milk for breakfast, and he’ll eat toast and marmite too. He eats my puddings if they are things like banana sponge with custard, except without the custard. *sigh*

It’s quite a big deal for us that we’ve managed to persevere, as it’s been hard work to keep on. It’s easy to worry about him and give in. I think if I wasn’t breastfeeding him I would have given in long ago. He gets great nutrition from my milk and he seems healthy and energetic these days. He always nurses in bed right before going to sleep, so he never starts the night with an empty tummy. He DOES sometimes wake in the night hungry though, and that’s heartbreaking :( He’s too sleepy to want to wake up and do anything about it, but he just says his tummy hurts and goes back to sleep but has a fitful night :(

Anyway, lately (maybe the last two weeks?) he has started tasting my food!!! Yay! He seems a lot less anxious about it in front of him, and he has started putting it to his mouth on a spoon and touching the food with his tongue. Then he yells with great excitement, ”I tried it, I tried it!!” :) We make a big thing of him for trying food so he is trying it more (with aforementioned excitement) these days. I think one day he’s just going to eat it. One day last week we had sausages, baked beans and mashed potatoes, and Arthur inhaled his baked beans (blink and they’re gone!) as usual. Then he wanted some of Neil’s, so Neil said he would give him some if he tried his sausage. Well he tasted his sausage and said, ”I like it!” and then proceeded to munch through an entire sausage without hesitation. Neil and I were just looking from Arthur to each other, wide-eyed in joy and disbelief, enormous silly smiles on our faces (the type you just can’t wipe off for anything), not daring to say anything in case we rocked the boat, hehe! It’s crazy how much it MEANS to a parent to see their child eating well, especially if it’s felt like forever with an eating issue. I feel pretty confident that if we just keep going the way we are, one day he is just going to put food in his mouth, declare that he likes it, and eat it all up. And then never look back. So we’ll carry on!

What else about Arthur? It’s getting so late. I ought to try and finish this up and post some photos.

Arthur seems to LOVE little babies. More so than the average toddler, I think. In crèche, there are a ton of things to do, and a bunch of other kids and babies, and he does race around at high speed doing things, but he’s the only child who is constantly drawn to the babies. He is ever so sweet with them, and talks to them in such an adult way, all crooning and tender, as though he’s an adult being all fond of the babies! He looks at me like we’re both adults, and smiles fondly at a baby, saying to me, ”Aww, look! He’s so little, isn’t he?!” :) He loves to give them things to play with, and chooses carefully what he thinks they might like. He has always done that, from about 13 months old (seriously!). He strokes their heads and holds their hands, and just keeps stopping what he’s doing to crouch down next to a sitting 8-month-old, and stroke their cheek and crane his neck so that his face is looking right up into theirs as best he can, and say, ”Hello little boy!” - or girl, these last few weeks he has finally stopped saying boy for all babies, hehe! But he DOES still say “he” – so for example, at crèche today, he said about a baby girl – ”This baby girl is smiling at me, isn’t he?!” Bless! He’s such a sweetie :) He does this kind of thing with ALL babies, at least up to Matthew’s age. One of the little ones he was talking fondly to yesterday had just turned one. He’s just SO SWEET with babies! I love to see it!

He is also very “parenty” with Matthew. If Matthew’s trying to get at something he shouldn’t put in his mouth (like say a tissue), Arthur will take it out of his reach and say to him, ”I’m sorry dah-ling, but that’s not for you” – shaking his head solemnly!! He mimics Neil and I SUCH a lot. We hear whole phrases and sentences come out of his mouth EXACTLY as we said them a week ago and in the right kind of context too. Arthur’s speech is just coming on wonderfully. I think he’s ahead for his age, but there’s such a range, and I don’t actually KNOW what is the expected norm at this age. I feel pretty sure he’s ahead though. My friend Katie from church said that Josh (who is 5 months older than Arthur) got the hang of “I” and “me” and “my” a few months ago, and that she thinks Arthur is doing pretty well having been using those for a couple of months already. He pronounces things toddlerishly (?!) sometimes, but otherwise his speech is really approaching the kind of general stuff that Neil and I say to each other! We can hold a pretty near adult conversation with him. He tells us things constantly, and he can now do so in many sentences without stopping, one after the other, describing things in lots of detail.

When Neil takes him to the park on Saturday mornings (while Matthew and I nap), he always comes back HIGHLY excited about his outing and desperate to pour it all out to me before he’s even through the door properly! A typical example is something he said last weekend when he came through the door: ”We went to the park!!! And derr was a squoah-woah!! (squirrel!) And it did run away on the grass, because it was scared. And derr was a woodpepper!! We heard it in the twees and we were looking fow it everywhere!! And it did flew away…. (sudden excited gasp) I saw a DEER!!!” Neil told me at that point that Arthur had looked and seen a big deer with antlers and said to Neil, ”Dere’s a deer! (thoughtful pause) It looks like you, Daddy.” Neil: “D’you mean it’s tall, like Daddy?” Arthur: “No. It looks like you, Daddy.” Hahaha, I found that quite amusing! ;) He is really beginning to come out with more and more funny little observations that make us laugh so much. Most of them he’s dead serious about (and we stifle our laughter or hold it till later when we can talk about it fondly after the boys are in bed!), but he also has a cheeky sense of humour and comes up with things to say that are purely for getting a laugh out of us.

His latest thing when “talking back” if I’ve asked him not to do something, or to come and do such-and-such when I have asked him 3 times already, is quiet protest and calm reasoning!!! Yikes!! It rather throws me, as I’m not sure how to respond to it. If I have asked him to give me something that he is not to have, he’ll look at me with a very authoritative, serious expression and say, ”I’m afwaid you can’t have that, Mummy, because it’s mine.” VERY matter-of-factly, and with a nod of the head on the word “mine” that just adds to the “and that’s that!” effect! He just repeats it if I tell/ask him to give it to me again, just as calmly as before! He uses “I’m afwaid not” a LOT at the moment, and it always totally floors me for some reason! He is also recently adopting a new sad face, when told he MUST come somewhere or other now, and he doesn’t want to. If there’s no time to argue it or give him a little longer or offer a distraction, then he simply has to do as he’s told and come. In the past this would often result in a tantrum of sorts. Now he has a new ultra-calm response. He looks like he’s going to get cross and throw a wobbler about it as he used to, but then suddenly he puts on his “sad face”. All the protest in him falls away, and he instantly looks downcast and sad. He quietly sits down where he is, hands folded in his lap, eyes turned down to look at his hands. He makes his mouth small and sad, and his eyes large and drooping. He doesn’t exaggerate the expression at ALL, and at first when he started doing it, Neil and I were quite worried! We kept asking him what was wrong, and a million other things, to try and find out what on earth had happened to him! We never see him so quiet and unmoving and forlorn looking! He won’t answer my questions, he just looks Ever So Sad and no matter if I know better, his magic just starts to worm its way into my heart and make me melt a little as I watch him! HOW does he do that?! If I finally pull myself together and just get authoritative and go to get him, he doesn’t meet my eye, just keeps looking sadly at his hands, and says, ”No, I can’t go down at der moment – I’m busy being sad.” !!!!!!! How do I argue with that?! The little monkey! He is beginning to make me think (and worry!) that he’s going to be a smooooth talker! I will have to keep on my toes.

Matthew just woke and nursed, and now it’s crazy late so I will have to save this and continue tomorrow, if I can. I’m just so tired out now, so I’m going straight to bed.

Back! It’s Monday, but very late already so I guess I’ll just post what I’ve done in a short while, and go to bed again. Otherwise I’ll just never get an entry posted, and I might as well be adding these bits and pieces to my diary as I write them! I MUST post some photos before I finish though.

Thanks for all the comments on my last entry, by the way! I forgot to say that yesterday! Thanks Jeannie for asking about Sarah too!

I did phone my brother this afternoon around 4pm but got the machine. So I figured they were out and decided to try in the evening after the boys were in bed. My mum was going to phone them too, to find out about their appt today. Well, I’ve phoned them this evening around 9pm and STILL just the machine!!! Then I phoned Mummy and we flapped about excitedly to each other, as she’d phoned them at about 5pm and got no answer. She left a message too, and said that Bennie usually gets back to her quickly and he hasn’t. So methinks something is going on, and more to the point, methinks they are NOT at home. Which brings me down from the excitement a bit, because (with my mind getting waaaay ahead of itself!) I am wondering if they went to their appt and had the scan, only to be told that something was not good with the baby or the placenta, and so they may well have been sent straight upstairs to be induced right away. And THAT makes me anxious for them, because if Sarah’s body really isn’t ready for labour yet, as it wasn’t only a few days ago, induction could be looonnng and drawn out, right? And if she doesn’t progress as fast as they want her to (uuuurrrgh! Another annoyance of mine with hospital births!), then she’ll be put under pressure and pumped full of actually-not-that-helpful labour-inducing drugs, and then her risk for ending up with a caesarean is SUPER high. And the hospital is a 1-in-3 hospital (as in one in THREE births is a caesarean! Is that not exasperatingly crazy?!!). And the ONE thing that they most want to avoid in the whole process is a caesarean. I’m so nervous that she’ll end up with one after all this, and have a hard time emotionally over it.

I know, my mind is painting all sorts of pictures that might not even be happening. Maybe there’s having a blissful spontaneous homebirth and don’t want to answer the phone?! ;) But Sarah is basically not able to get out now so they wouldn’t just be “out”. And with the appt earlier today…. I just feel pretty sure they’re in the hospital and things haven’t gone according to plan, which makes me feel physically uneasy and unhappy. I am finding it so hard to think about them, for some reason most especially when I’m holding Matthew in the dark (falling asleep) to settle/comfort him, or to let him burp after I breastfeed him (which I’ve done three times this evening already! Still no teeth to show for this misery, urgh!). I just feel overwhelmed with this feeling of attachment to them, like I can hardly bear the separation at this time. It’s not the not-knowing, it’s a sort of vague feeling of wanting to protect or mother them somewhat, feeling like they might be having a hard time and wanting with all my heart to be there with them to help and support them. I hate being unable to BE somewhere when I feel like this! I spend the whole time holding Matthew, just praying for them, but I still feel sort of anxious in my tummy about it. I hope all three of them are okay, and that we get a happy phone call tomorrow – that it doesn’t drag out ages for them. *sigh*

Well.

Back to what I was writing yesterday – what was that again?! Oh yes, Arthur’s talking and stuff. I have SO much more that I could write about his lively chatter, and reams of stuff that he’s said to make note of. But no tiiime!

Oh, we are NOT potty training yet, but we are casually offering him the potty to sit on straight after he comes out of the bath. This is mainly because he pretty much gets out of the bath and pees on the floor, so we figured he’d be better sitting on the potty and doing it there! We’re not actually intending to take action on potty training right now. I feel very laid-back about it and am happy enough for him to lead us. I am not bothered about him being in nappies for however long he might be in them. I love his cloth nappies anyway, so that’s an added bonus if he stays in them a while longer! I am not looking forward to when he’s using the toilet actually. I feel like I SHOULD be, but those feelings just aren’t there. He’ll want to, when he’s ready. He is definitely checking pretty much all of the signs off the readiness list now though. Well, he doesn’t seem dry after sleep, but then I don’t change his nappy right after naps – I put him in a new one right BEFORE he naps, so I wouldn’t know if he wakes dry. He’s wet after the night, but Neil says it has been a few months now that he hasn’t needed as many inserts in his night nappies for absorbency. Anyway. He has peed in the potty three nights running after his bath now, and he is always excited to take the potty up with Neil to empty it into the toilet. It’s making him more eager to perform again the next time! If they bath before we eat dinner (which occasionally happens these days) and he pees in the potty, we offer him big boy pants to wear instead of a nappy, until bed time. He always chooses big boy pants – Thomas the Tank ones :) They’re age 2-3 but they seem awfully tight on him at the moment. Last time I put them on him was a couple of months ago, and they fit him very comfortably then. He has DEFINITELY been growing all over lately. Neil and I have really noticed lately – his limbs are noticeably longer and seem sturdier than ever, and he is taller. His feet look BIG to me, and he has real “little boy” hands now, not chubby baby hands. I can’t believe my baby is growing up!!!

Arthur loves crafts! I do crafts with him all the time. Katie told me that she thinks boys are less into crafts than girls. She reckons on the whole they are more into motor skills and have less of an attention span for crafts than girls do. Arthur is definitely big on the motor skills, but he DOES have a great attention span and is heavily into crafts. I personally love doing them with him. Doing kiddie crafts comes naturally to me and I enjoy it so much. Lately we’ve been making pictures of animals, over the last month. I put things on our walls that Arthur makes (well, the stuff that comes out really nice, or that he’s especially proud of), and we’ve made so much lovely stuff lately that we’re running out of wall space! Unless I give the whole adult-décor over to toddler artwork! We make one big project a day, or every other day if it doesn’t work out, while Matthew naps in the morning. Arthur also does a lot of drawing and sticking and gluing and painting, but the big projects are things he gets very excited about. I let him request what he wants to make, and then we get to work on it! He wanted to make a sheep, so I cut a cardboard sheep shape out, and we stuck white cotton wool balls all over it, and then glued black paper on the legs and nose, and made a pink ear! The next day he wanted to make a pig, so I cut a cardboard pig out, and we had a blast tearing and scrunching up pink tissue paper to glue all over the pig! I like to vary the materials and textures as much as possible for him. The next time, we made a cow. I got out the white finger paint for Arthur to splodge and splurge a white background onto a cow shaped piece of card, with his hands. He LOVED that and giggled the whole time! When it dried, we glued black velour patches onto the cow that I cut out, and pink paper udders and nose! I made a pipe-cleaner tail and he taped that on the back.

I so love doing these things! It’s as much fun for me, as it is for Arthur, really! I bought yellow and brown feathers at eBay (reeeally cheap) when I saw the theme Arthur was on, so when he asked to do a chicken, I was all ready with the feathers, orange card and yellow tissue paper! And a few days later we made yellow towelling chicks with yellow feathered wings :) Those are all on the wall – I took a picture!

Sometimes if Arthur’s climbing the walls and driving me crazy, I can put him at the kitchen table (now that I’m keeping it a LITTLE cleaner these days!) and set him up with a craft activity. I need to think on my toes, especially if I’m trying to cook dinner while he does it, or something, but I’m blessed to find that easy with crafts. He always asks to do an animal, so one day like this when he asked to do a giraffe, I sketched him a really badly-drawn giraffe (sigh), and grabbed some brown and yellow paper, orange card, and yellow towelling, and orange fleece. And chopped bits up for him to sort of collage with glue on the giraffe shape. While he did that, he told me his giraffe needed some grass to eat (!!) so I went onto the driveway (in the rain, with Matthew on my hip) and picked some long weedy grass from the border. He stuck that on his picture! The next day he wanted to do a frog, so we made a lovely collage of a tissue paper frog on a lily pad, on a pond! The pond was the best fun (though Arthur likes scrunching tissue paper best!) because I’d been hanging onto that idea for ages wanting to do it with him! I got a big tin of Quality Street for my birthday, and I have been keeping the wrappers carefully for crafts. I had Arthur stick silver foil wrappers all over the pond area, and then put another layer of glue on top of it, and then I got the blue cellophane wrappers from all the coconut and whatever-the-other-ones-are sweets, and he glued those all over the top of the foil, so that it looked all blue and shimmery! I cut him long triangles of green gummed paper (his first lick-and-stick!! I remember lick-and-stick from nursery school!!) and he licked and stuck and licked and stuck grass all the way around the edge of the pond. He did great! I do help a lot with the layout and guide him over where to stick things and why. We put a little black fly on at the last minute, and a flower on another lily pad, and Arthur still points to his picture, giggling, and saying, ”Dere’s a fly! (giggle) The fwog’s gonna go - GLULP! (much hysterical giggling!)”

Today he wanted to make a monkey, and I have brown fleece and velour ready, and green tissue paper for the tree he’s going to be swinging from, and I’m thinking a banana for his hand, made out of something-I-know-not-what-yet. But he ate a crayon after I told him not to, so that means the end of the craft session. *sigh* But tomorrow, probably. It’s so much fun thinking about what we’ll use to make things, and then seeing him enjoy the variety of things! I’m loving it!

I bought him magnetic letters and numbers for the fridge last week and he is so thrilled with them. He asks for them every day, and generally spends an hour straight putting them on the fridge and sorting them, chatting to them the entire time as he does so! He knows some of his numbers by sight, and can find them for me if I ask him. He knows some letters, but not many. I’ve started to do silly things to help him recognise them. Like, I’ll say, “Here’s ‘n’ for NIBBLE?!!” and then eat his neck till he squeals and begs me to stop! :) I noticed it took him approximately 20 seconds to permanently learn that one, hehe! He keeps running into the living room, brandishing the letter ‘n’ and shouting, ”I’ve got ‘n’ for NIBBLE!!” and then running from me screeching with excitement over the inevitable neck munching ;) Other letters can be similarly played with, hehe!

He was so intent on playing with his letters and numbers on the fridge the other day while I was emptying the dishwasher, that I overheard something ever so sweet happening! He was chatting away to the letters, and this is what I heard: ”Ooh, four!! Now, where you going to go?.... Uhhhm, HERE!.... Now, where will dis one go….” And then suddenly he started looking annoyed and distracted, and then he looked at his crotch and started flapping his hands like he was shooing something, and said, “Shoo! Shoo! Go ‘way poo! Shoo-shoo!” Hehehe! Then he tried to get back to his letters and numbers, but only lasted about 5 seconds before he suddenly flapped his arms down in frustration, sighed, and then stood up and said to himself in a very exasperated tone, ”I think I goingta hafta go inny other room and DO it.” and then he marched off! I laughed SO much while he couldn’t see me doing it! ;) He will not poo in the same room as us any more. He takes himself elsewhere. He used to tell US to go away, but we started suggesting he go into the other room if he wants to poo, and he seems happier with that. I know he’s really getting ready for potty training. That’s okay. We’ll get there. I don’t think there’s any rush, but I’ll speed up if he seems to want to get on with it.

Okay I have just looked at the time and I don’t even want to SAY what time it is, so I’m definitely going to stop now and post this! I have lots of photos, so I’ll post the ones that relate more to Arthur this entry, since it’s mostly about him. They are all from before his haircut, as I'm so behind on photos! I’ll have to catch up with more, and Matthew stuff, next time!


Here is Arthur’s latest artwork, most of which is described above – the last photo shows two of Arthur’s most recent favourite thing to draw – “wainbows”!!

Playing with his helicopter from Uncle Ian (Christmas present):

Having found and opened a tube of Smarties from a hidden Easter Egg (handed out at the hospital when we went for his feet appt, but hidden by me so he wouldn't find it and eat it while I wasn't watching! Which is exactly what he did anyway!):

Just being Arthur:

There are photos of me when I was little, EXACTLY like that last photo. If I had one I'd scan it and post it. It's uncanny! I was the same way - boundless energy, slightly manic expressions (!) and picklish mischief. Every time I send my parents photos of the boys, they say they do more, "Ohh, isn't he JUST like Alice in that one!!" than the time before!

At the park (he's running away from me in the second one - I said it was time to go back to the car, and in about 0.5 seconds he had turned on his heel and legged it, as you see here! It looks like he's walking, but actually he was REALLY running! It didn't half take me a while to catch him!)

A couple from outings I took the boys on last week before all the (gorgeous!) rain we're currently having:

Wearing my shoes in the porch! He has really started to want to play dressing up a LOT lately. We have nothing to dress up with. I'm going to find some stuff on eBay I hope! :) He likes to pretend he's a doctor and tells me to, "Hmmm.... Open up wide!.... Hmmm..." as he peers into my mouth, hehe!

He's still seriously into building towers and things with bricks. He is thrilled with Neil gets ALL the bricks and helps him build "sheds" for his Thomas trains! Here his early one morning playing with what they built the night before:

And here he is just the day before yesterday, building a tower all by himself (he called us to watch!):

Saturday, 5 May 2007

Newsy update about the boys

Diaryland is being crap for non-gold members, but Nicola bought me 3 months gold membership for this diary and my pregnancy one! And Jemma bought me 3 months gold for my pregnancy diary too!! :) How totally lovely is that?!!! I am so excited! So here I am to make good use of my gifts :) I will try to update more often. I have soooooooo much to write about as always, so it would be good to get more updates done!

It's already after 1am (yikes!) so this MUST be short, but it's taken me ages to upload photos from the camera (112!!!) this evening so I haven't had chance to write till now.

I will fill in the gaps next entry, but there are a few main points that I didn't want to miss out this time:

* My brother's new baby is nearly here!!!! Sarah's due date was yesterday - can you believe it?!! It's crazy how fast the time has gone. They still have the envelope from the ultrasound with the sex of the baby written inside, but they NEVER OPENED IT!!! Talk about willpower! So it's a lovely surprise. I am soooo sure it's a girl though. They are having a homebirth and using cloth nappies, and I am ultra proud of my influence! It's their first baby and everything :) Bennie is so excited about all their cloth nappies. They are using Tots Bots, Motherease One-Size, and Kissaluvs. And ME Airflow wraps. They looked at ours in great detail and then searched the web (and asked The Nappy Lady) before making their purchases. I'm so excited for them! And meee! I am going to be an auntie again!

* On that subject, we found out a week or so ago that Neil's sister (the one who already has little Ella, who will be two on Matthew's first birthday) had a miscarriage around Easter. We didn't know she was pregnant as she hadn't told us yet, but I knew they were going to start trying at the end of last year. She was 11 weeks pregnant - I can't even imagine, urgh. It was not an ultrasound discovery - her husband was away on business in Hawaii and she was on her own in the house with Ella when she just started bleeding heavily. She had to call her in-laws to take Ella while she had a D&C at the hospital :( Poor Rosemary. I just can't imagine how awful that must be. She is okay now, physically, but not emotionally, according to Neil's mum. Neil phoned her but got the machine, and I tried to phone a couple of days ago and left a message also. I don't know what to say to her but I want her to know we are thinking of her and we love her. :(

* Matthew is changing so much! Soooo much that I know I'll miss stuff out when I try to write about it. I will have to check my last entry to see what he was "up to" last time I wrote, and then I know what things I have yet to update about!

* He says "dada" to Neil, both on request and when I mention Daddy to him. When Neil gets home from work, Matthew drops what he's holding or turns from what he's playing with, the INSTANT he hears the key in the front door, and looks so excited and happy! He starts saying, "Dada, dada!" in this soft little under-his-breath whisper, eyes locked on the front door. He LOVES his Daddy! He does not say Mama yet :( But one day he will! He said Nana one time when I was talking to Mummy on the phone and when he pulled up on me I told him that Nana was on the phone. Mummy was soooooooo chuffed to hear it! His babbling sounds so different these days, just over the last few weeks. All his babbling sounds like speech, complete with intonations and expressions and all sorts, but none of it is actual words! It's very sweet :)

* He took HIS FIRST STEP!!! I mean, only one step, but yay! A milestone! I don't think he'll be walking for a while yet though. He is purposely stopping short of the TV unit when he cruising along the sofa, just enough so that he has to shift his feet and lean out to reach and transfer his hands to the TV unit. I don't know why really, but I'm guessing he's trying to set up some practise for himself. He does try to set up things so that he "practises" having to get to someplace in a different way than usual, lately. He does a lot of standing without support next to something he was cruising along, like the sofa. He just lets go and stands.

He also does a lot of letting go and turning away from the sofa or other place he's cruising, and THEN sitting down to crawl away. I was sitting on the floor with my back against the sofa yesterday or the day before (can't remember which) and he cruised up to me, stopped short just far enough so that he couldn't quite reach my knees (which were drawn up to my chest), and turned his body out from the sofa towards them. Then he let go the sofa, took a careful (not tumbling) STEP towards my knees and in reaching them, he held on! Only a step, but we were all there to see it and it was so surprisingly controlled, like he had totally planned it (maybe he had?!)! Yay for Matthew!

* Still only 4 teeth, but he's been teething again for EVER (weeks and weeks, I kid you not), so I'm hoping some more will come for him soon. He's had to have Calpol and all sorts, and still no sign of teeth - BUT yesterday when I put Bonjela on his gums, his top lateral teeth (the ones either side of his top middle front teeth) have swollen gums over them, so hmmm... Arthur had 6 teeth by Matthew's age, and they were the top middle FOUR and the bottom middle two, so maybe Matthew is working on those top laterals? Hopefully they'll come through soon and he'll get a small break.

* Matthew is pretty good at his fine motor skills now. His pincer grip has been great for a couple of months now, and he plays in quite a lot of detail with toy cars and Duplo and building bricks. Two days ago, I was sitting on one side of the upturned laundry basket, with Matthew on the other side, and I was building little towers of bricks for him to knock down on the basket. I lay a few out on the basket for him to smash around, and to my AMAZEMENT, the boy picked a cube up, and placed it precaroiusly on top of another! He took SO much care over doing it, and his hand wavered back and forth over his target for a while before he was happy enough with his aim to let the brick go oh-so-carefully. And it stayed on top!!! I was busy squealling and clapping (as you do!) and blow me down if he didn't pick up another brick and SUCCESSFULLY stack it on top of the other two! Then the tower fell, as it was a little bit unbalanced with how he'd placed the top brick, but oh my GOSH, he's only 10 months old!!!!! I thought Arthur was marvellous when he was building towers of bricks at about 12 months! He was nearly 14 months when he built a tower of 8 bricks, which (forgive the egotistical tones) is pretty advanced for his age. I think it was only a few months ago when I received a babycentre email for my 2.something year-old that said, "Your child may now be able to stack a tower of 6 bricks!" ;) So I know it was pretty good going. But I am so impressed with Matthew building a tower of 3 bricks at 10 months! I think that's amazing.

/proud rant

* Oh no wait, I have more proud ranting (sorry!), because I was going to write a bit about Arthur too. He is doing great! He will be 30 months old in 4 days time. That makes him exactly 2½. I can not believe I have a 2½ year old! And he is already half-way to another birthday! Whaa???!!

He is growing up so much. I mean, he's still a baby really, in many many ways - he's ONLY TWO. But he's growing up. He is changing shape. His legs and arms have had a growth spurt lately and he has also got taller suddenly too. He is slimming down a LOT. His nappies are now on the closest settings and some even overlap, which is unheard of for Arthur! He was never anywhere NEAR the closest setting on ANY nappy before! ;) He fits clothes that he had previously outgrown at the waist, and his age 2-3 jeans no longer need turning up at the ankle. He's as tall as his friends who are about to turn 3, taller than some.

Arthur's final two teeth are coming in - the first corner of each of his top 2-year-old molars are visible through the gum. He is teething fine. Sometimes he asks for Bonjela or Calpol for his teeth, but he doesn't seem bothered by them too much. He bites on things and drools, but he doesn't act in pain. It's about the first time in his life that he hasn't teethed AWFULLY, and about time too! I feel kind of sad that he's such a big grown-up boy now that he has no more baby teeth to get, but at the same time I am thrilled to see the back of teething for him at last! His bottom 6-year-old molars are RIGHT THERE beneath the gums, ready to go when it's time. His bottom gums at the back are white, raised and hard with those teeth underneath. His top ones haven't come down yet though.

* Arthur was due his 2nd MMR vaccine a while back but I can't find his red book and am in no hurry right now to get him done. Matthew is due his final meningitis and pneumococcal vaccines and he's months late for them but I never seem to get around to taking him. I must sort that out. Then he's done till his MMR (which I'll delay like Arthur's).

* Arthur can do so much on his feet, despite them being a tad wonky, poor love! He runs and jumps and spins around (constantly!), and he balances really well with them. He dances in so many different ways now. He can balance on one leg for a couple of seconds, either leg. He can jump on a springy surface (like a bed) completely rhythmically. My mum noticed it a few months ago - February, when we were all at my grandparents for my granny's birthday. She was holding his hand while he jumped on the bed upstairs (!!) and noticed he jumped in perfect time to maximise his bounce on the next jump! She was a PE teacher her whole career and said she was very impressed that he was doing that as his age.

Arthur taught himself to do a forward roll maybe 4 or 5 months ago. He practised on the sofa as it's easy to roll over on a soft surface, and then started doing it on the floor. He can do these perfectly controlled forward rolls! He looks like he is starting to do a head-stand, and then when he's balanced on his head, he suddenly brings his body over and controls a fast roll all the way down his spine! He flips into a sitting position and beams around the room at anyone who is watching! I'm quite amazed at him sometimes. Over the last month we've noticed him trying to do backward rolls on the sofa (from sitting on the arm with his back to the sofa seats), and now he can do them quite well. He teaches himself everything and is in a phase of TOTAL "do-it-allbyself!" about everything!! Which is quite wearing, but he's so determined and stubborn (wonder where he got that from?!). Apparantly he's ever so like me. When I was younger than him, I used to say crossly to people, "Aice do it!!" if they tried to help me do things! Arthur is JUST like that about evvvverything right now. It's his age too, I know.

I really want to enrol Arthur in some sort of toddler gym type class. I think he would LOVE it, given his enthusiam for anything active, and how well he takes to gym-like skills. I need to look into it.

* The boys had haircuts today! Arthur's hair was sooooo long that it was getting in his eyes and was right down his neck. It looked really untidy, but last weekend Neil took him to the hairdressers (well, the barbers where Neil gets his hair cut) and he refused to have it cut! He accepted the lollipop they bribed him with and sat in the chair licking it, but then refused the haircut again! ;) So they came home. THIS weekend, Mummy went with them, hehe! And if Mummy decides that the boy is getting a haircut, that's what we'll be leaving with! ;) So he refused, but we bribed him with Smarties. He raaarely gets sweets or chocolates, and I know he loves Smarties from when we treated him to some on his birthday, so we used them as a bribe. He ate half a tube (way more than I was happy about!) while his hair was cut.

They cut it sooooooooooo short!!!! I wasn't too pleased. I like little boys to have flopsy haircuts, personally. It keeps them cute and little for longer :) He'll have endless years of short grown-up cuts ahead of him, starting in just a couple of years, but for NOW he doesn't need to get those. It actually really suits him to have floppy little-boy haircuts, so I want to keep him in those. But they cut it so short. Thank goodness his hair grows like CRAZY and will no doubt be in his eyes again by some point in July! I swear, if he was a girl and I'd let his hair just grow and grooowww, it would be RIGHT down his back by now. He had THREE INCHES cut off today! Here he is with his super short cut. He looks too grown up to me! And I miss his curls! But the back is still trying to twist up into little curls, so I know they're still there really :)

Then, if that wasn't hard enough for a mother's heart-strings (!), my BABY boy had his first haircut! I think my voice must have carried a tone that said, "DO NOT mess with the overly emotional mother!" when I told the man NOT to take much off Matthew's hair. I just hovered around Matthew in the big chair, and kept saying, "Don't take much off! He's still my baby!" *sigh* Thankfully, Matthew's hair looks much the same, just a little tidier around the sides and back. It was getting long enough that it was starting to twist and curl a little at the back. I don't think he'll have curly hair like his brother, but he does seem to have a wave to his hair. When it gets long enough (like an inch down his neck, which it was before today!), the long bits twist round themselves - nothing like Arthur's curls, which curl upwards away from his head. Matthew's waves are like ringlet twists, or the start of something like that. His top hair is STILL springy and won't lie down! It's so cute :) Here's a photo of Matthew after his haircut this afternoon. It's not a good one, but it's the only photo I got where he wasn't blurred from moving about! He was looking up at the sky through the window :)

Neil got his hair cut too. Now I just wish *I* could get a hair cut! I never get time to go! My hair is crazy long and I'm starting to find it annoying. It's down to the bottom of my ribcage. I love my hair long, but it just feels toooooo long, and I want it cut. Preferably LOTS cut off, but I don't want it too short and I am not crazy on "styles". I just like my hair "growing out of my head" as I always like to say ;)

My brain is starting to fog over, so typing any more is going to be a bit pointless now. Also it's really late so high time I went to bed. I have a few more photos to post - all recent ones. There are so many more than aren't so recent as these, but I just wanted to get some photos up at last, so I resized only my favourites and I'll get to the rest another time (I hope!). Here they are:

Matthew being smiley at something a week ago:

Matthew riding on Daddy's shoulders at the park about a week ago - I have lots of photos of my 3 boys from this outing, but this was my absolute favourite and I only had time to resize a few tonight, so here it is:

He was SO THRILLED to be up on Neil's shoulders! He clung with his fists to Neil's hair and kept gasping and squealing. He looked SO TINY up there!! He rode on Daddy's shoulders for maybe 15 minutes! He loved every second of it and smiled a lot :) He is only a tiny light-weight beanie boy so he didn't hurt Daddy :) Isn't he just SUCH a cutie-pea-pickle-boo-bop?!

And the last ones are two (out of many that I'll hopefully post soon) of the boys together, when they were playing on the sofa again. Matthew sort of leaned on the sofa arm for a rest after a while, and Arthur just flopped down almost on top of him and alternately rested and cuddled his brother :) They are so sweet together, and still get on wonderfully. They love each other soooo obviously, and play together almost constantly when they're both up and awake at the same time. Arthur does a LOT of play by himself at the moment, imaginary play, cars, etc, but otherwise they play together all the time. I'm so happy when I watch them together! And increasingly feeling ready to add another little member to my happy band of boys (because, I can't imagine ever having a girl now!). But that's another story, and it belongs in another diary anyways, so I'll finish for now with the two photos of my sweetie boys. I'll update again asap!

Saturday, 28 April 2007

Computer annoyances!

Ugh. Our computer broke. Well, more specifically, our monitor broke. It started doing this annoying thing where it would go black after TWO SECONDS of being on, and the only way to get the screen back on was to press the monitor on/off button. Then I could see the screen again for precisely 2 seconds before it went black. And so I’d press the on/off button again, and get another 2 seconds, etc. It wasn’t a screen saver issue, it was just the monitor. How annoying though! Two seconds isn’t enough to see a THING, and I soooo wanted to update my diaries here! I am missing all my favourite places – people’s diaries and some forums and stuff. I actually have got rather behind in diaries lately though. I haven’t had chance to read much in more than a week or two! I must catch up before I get toooo behind! I also desperately wanted to update my Fertility Friend chart, since I’m charting-obsessed, hehe! It was driving me crazy, until a couple of days ago I went on and just literally pressed the monitor button again and again, until I had managed to put a few days’ temps and basic stats on. Two seconds wasn’t even enough to get the cursor to anything I wanted to click on – almost, but not quite enough. So I just persevered. I moved it most of the way, and then switched the black screen back on, and then the rest of the way and clicked, and then put the screen back on to see where I was at, before trying the same thing again! Sooooooo frustrating!

Anyway. We have temporarily moved the computer downstairs (yay for Matthew finally getting his bedroom back while he sleeps, poor love!) because my husband had the presence of mind when we bought our TV a few years ago, to choose one that has a port for a PC, so it can be used as a PC monitor! Yay! So here I am sitting rather awkwardly on the sofa, not feeling that comfortable, and looking wayyy off to the right (which is going to cause all sorts of problems with my neck), but at least I’m heeeere!! Neil bought a Broadband extension cable on the way home from work, so we could get internet access, but of course it’s a faulty one. Yep. No dial tone whatsoever, no matter what we do, even on our phone. Grrrr! It’s 10.30pm and he’s at Tesco right now, hoping they’ll sell one! The other one was from Homebase and that’s closed now. We got a new laptop this month because Neil has been working at his company for TEN YEARS (!!) and so he got £500 worth of vouchers as a reward! :) He could have chosen one of many places to get them made out to, but we decided we wanted to have a laptop as a second PC and so that we weren’t in Matthew’s sleeping space all the time using the computer. So he had them made out to PC World and now we have a laptop! We had to spend a little bit more than the vouchers to get one worth having, and even so, the graphics on my Sims games aren’t nearly as good as on our computer, but yaaaaaay, we have a laptop!!! Neil has a router to get the two networked together, so we can get internet access on both. But he needed to use the computer to set it up, so that’s why we’ve brought it down here. Once the laptop is set up with the internet, that will be where I write my diary entries, and I’m soooooo excited!!! I can write anywhere in the house, and that feels so freeing :)

Anyway. I thought I might as well start typing a diary entry in Word while we don’t have internet access, so that’s what I’m doing! Hopefully I’ll be able to post the entry at my diary soon.

The little boys are doing fine! How I love them, love them, love them!!! I will have to put photos in another entry, because I can’t figure that out at the moment, but I must get some up soon. Arthur is talking incredibly - I have a million and one examples to write in my diary, but I am just boggling at the increasing complexity of his sentences! His improvements in talking stopped being about vocabulary quite a while back now, and he just amazes me with his use of context and emotion and humour and so on, in his speech. He just totally gets everything. Everything. I do have soooo many little phrases that I’ve been jotting down now and then as he says them, but I want to write those another time when I have more time for a proper diary entry. Just one though! Yesterday he was crawling around the living room, pretending to be a car that was looking for a car park to park in, and I was sitting on the floor making piles of clean laundry to put away. I put a big pile of towels next to me, and when Arthur crawled up to them he stopped suddenly and said, ”Oh!” as though the pile was stopping him playing his game. Then he said to me, clear as day, ”Mummy, can you please move the pile so that I can get in the car park?” Where’s one of those boggly-eyed smileys?!!

Oooh, Neil just pulled up outside!...

Bah, stupid Tesco! They DO have them, but wouldn’t you know it?! The section with the PC related stuff was cordoned off because fork-lift trucks were randomly going backwards and forwards past it and it therefore wasn’t safe!!! How unlikely is that?!!! Urrrrrrrrgh!!! Poor Neil – a totally wasted journey. Pfthth. I will take the stupid faulty one back to Homebase tomorrow and nooobody had better mess with me! Tsk.

Okay, I’m going to put this aside for tonight, even though I haven’t written much, because if the internet isn’t going to work and I’m uncomfy sitting at this angle, then I might as well switch off for now and play The Sims on the laptop! I’ll probably post this as an entry just as it is, tomorrow when we (hopefully) get our internet access back again. And then I’ll do a proper entry asap after that. I reeeally want to update my pregnancy diary next though (not that I’m pregnant yet, don’t worry!).

[ETA: Posting now (1am, yikes!) as we figured out it was a cable, not the extension line, and now we can get online, yay!}

Tuesday, 17 April 2007

Arthur's feet and photos... Warning! Ice-cream mentioned!

Ohhhhhhhhhhh my goodness, I have just been thrown into a state of complete gahgghhhhhaaaahhhmmmmmmm due to having randomly come across the UK Ben & Jerry's website. I haven't had Ben & Jerry's ice-cream for aaages, but just looking at the pictures has made me go all chemically unbalanced, haha! Seriously. My mouth has been watering like crazy for a straight 20 minutes now (and I'm not even looking at the pictures any more!), and I wanted some of this -

- soooo bad that I actually felt the same throat n chest squeezy thing that I get when I am going to CRY! Half Baked = cookie dough ice cream swirled with chocolate fudge brownie ice cream. Oh. My. Bob. There be the watery mouth again. *sigh*

My first favourite of theirs (waaay back in the early (mid?) 90s, was this one:

Mmmmm, cookie doooough... Soooo want some right now... But Half Baked is my current favourite due to being both cookie dough AND a ton of chocolate, all at once! :) Anyway, then my dad went to buy some for a treat one evening and only found this one:

New York Super Fudge Chunk. Why oh why on earth have they discontinued that one?! Thank goodness I can still find it occasionally, if I'm lucky. I just love the HUGE slabs of white and dark chocolate in amongst it all. Lovely ice-cream!

If that wasn't bad enough, I then saw TWO flavours that I have never tried - well, more than two, but two that I haven't tried but REALLY want to try. Here's one of them:

It looks divine - strawberry cheesecake ice-cream (what a unique flavour!) with real strawberries and cookie swirls - cookie swirls, people! I want to lick my monitor. Thank goodness I'm not pregnant right now. Then I WOULD be crying, and also out on a crazy night errand to track some down at an all-night supermarket.

Okay, but perhaps even more tantalising is this one:

It is sweet cream ice-cream with lots of chunky bits in it - I can't resist chunks of things in ice-cream! Actual chocolate cookies, oh yes. And chocolate dinosaurs?! And a swirl of chocolate fudge. Gaaaghhghghgh... Our Cornish vanilla ice-cream in the freezer suddenly seems SO LAME in comparison! I need chocolate! And CHUNKS!

And I'm not even hormonal - well, I feel like I am now, but I'm really not! I have to get me some Ben & Jerry's next time I go food shopping. Which is a whole four days away, yarrgh!

I can't believe I'm here AFTER MIDNIGHT, waffling away about ice-cream when I should be sleeping!

Oh but I will just quickly update about general stuff.

Had another weird weekend like the previous one. Came over exhausted, weak, dizzy, etc, and I had the WORST headache on Sunday. I pretty much had to lie down most of the time and was not up to doing anything with the boys, again. Saturday night I was so wiped out and my head hurt so much (painkillers didn't touch it like the last time) that I put Matthew to bed at 7.45pm, nursed Arthur to sleep at 8pm and literally was in bed for the night at 8.15pm! Which is NOT me, as you know! The most annoying part was that even though I was lying there palpitating and feeling too exhausted to breathe, I was STILL lying there at midnight, having not been able to get to sleep yet. And feeling no better for all those hours of lying down. I did get to sleep before 1am I think. Then I stayed in bed all the next morning while Neil took the boys to church (he did my creche duty again, the lovely thing) to try and sleep it off, but couldn't go to sleep again. It's so weird, because I NEVER have sleep trouble these days, when I actually get the chance to lie down and close my eyes! I used to, but that was yeeears ago, before I had children (and became this permanently knackered, hehe!).

By the end of Sunday I was starting to feel a bit better. I was okay during the week last time too. It's so annoying how it hits at the weekend, because then I can't enjoy having Neil home, or do anything to help him out with the boys (except breastfeed), so that's a lot for him to take on. And I can't get any time for myself either, like a time-out from the week's "mummyness". Anyway. Monday morning I decided to start drinking a ton of water, because I am pretty bad at that and I breastfeed two kids, neither of whom are tiny babies any longer, but both of whom still take a LOT of milk from me each day. And it's getting warm and muggy. And I am just bad at fluids anyway. So yesterday I drank 2.5 litres of water throughout the day - go me! :) I'm doing well if I drink a litre normally, including milk and other drinks. But I had milk and juice on top of the 2.5 litres yesterday. Today I have had 2 litres. I just want to make sure I have a minimum of 2 litres of WATER, with other drinks as a surplus. I have a tick chart on the fridge door. I think that's a good way to keep me motivated (something I am not usually much good at!), so I hope I will be able to keep this up.

I also decided to start taking prenatal vitamins again. It's 3 months till we're hoping to make a baby again, so it's time to start them - what?! How is that possible?! It's exciting :) And they'll do me some good in the meantime too.

Anyway. I feel good at the moment. I just hope I won't have another crappy weekend! Neil had to do the food shopping the last two weekends running, and that has been my job since I started the family meals (over 2 months now!). Poor Neil!

He is hearing back from various job applications - all "Thanks, but no" for now, although he is still applying for new ones all the time. I'll try to keep updating about that, as eventually it will result in a HUGE life change for us, and probably sometime soon!

Arthur had a follow-up appt with the physio at the hospital about his feet, yesterday. He last went in July, when Matthew was 3 weeks old, and she wanted to wait to see him again till he was jumping and stuff, when he was nearer 2 and a half. For those who haven't been reading me since way back when Arthur was a baby, he has inherited a (much-hated-by-me!) gene from Neil that means he has "curly feet". Neil's mum has the same - for her, it was called clubfoot, but it's not actually REAL clubfoot. Neil has it, and 2 of his 3 siblings have it too. The three of them had surgery on their toes (YOW!) to try to correct it in their teens. Arthur's physio recoiled when we told her that, and described it as practically barbaric and terribly old-fashioned, and said it would do more harm than good, etc. Neil doesn't have curly feet - he never did, it's just that they are terribly stiff and the tendons seem to just get short and so his feet have no flexibility at all. He has high arches and he can't squat or put his heel down when he runs. He has been getting bad knee pain (esp in the winter) since his early 20s, but he is currently having physio too and his X-rays are normal, so he doesn't have arthritis. It's just his darn feet. Arthur's physio says the surgery would have stiffened his feet FURTHER. They actually removed the tendons in his toes and turned them the other way up (?!) to stop his toes from curling under, as they were being pulled more and more that way over time. So now he has the same trouble, but he has no ability to curl his toes whatsoever. Stoopid idea.

Anyway. Arthur's treatment was a series of full-leg plaster casts, which started at 5 months old. He had to have both legs in plaster for a week at a time, and the casts held his foot straight - well, exaggeratedly turned-out, so as to correct the curl. After a week, he had the casts removed, and then another pair put on immediately, pulling his foot further into the right position. Like a gradual stretch-and-hold thing. They only stopped them once his foot graded normal after the casts were removed. He had four consecutive plasters at first, and then after some months his feet started to regress a little, so he wore night boots (horrible things!) and those helped. Then his feet regressed a little again and he went back in plasters about halfway through my pregnancy with Matthew - after his first birthday - 14 months old I think?

Anyway, the first plaster broke within 24 hours and he was just too active to keep him from breaking his cast before it was hardened properly, so the physio said it didn't matter - his feet were almost perfect - so we should just go for follow up appts and see how things went.

Well, we went back, and she thinks (as do we) that his feet have got worse again :( Not AWFUL, but definitely worse. His toes are awfully curly - inwards towards his instep, which you could see on the photos of him standing with his traffic jam picture a few entries back - Meg, I think you even noticed and asked! I forgot to follow up on that, sorry! The outside of his big toes rub on his shoes, and he does sometimes trip up when he runs, over his curly toes.

She said his right foot is worse than the left, which is about normal for Arthur throughout. He has high arches, which he SHOULDN'T have at his age, and that's disappointing, because we finally managed to get those arches gone with the treatment before. It's the high arches which will cause him trouble in the future when he's older, like Neil. I know it's pointless, and I know I've said it before, but I HATE THAT GENE! It's irrational of me, but when I am thinking about his feet, I feel so burningly angry and resentful towards Neil and his mum and their whole "line", that they've passed an actual deformity on to my child! How silly is that?! But I feel it. It's wrong as well. I need to fix that. Pfthth. Especially since I could just as easily have passed on an inability to tell colours apart! But I haven't, thankfully. I am still watching Matthew though. Any sons of mine...

Anyway. She thinks we just watch and wait for now. She said the curliness WILL resolve over time (even if it takes a few years) and that she's not worried about that. Just the high arches. She wants us to buy lace-up shoes for him next winter instead of velcro ones, as they'll give a snugger fit to his feet which will correct them a little as he walks. He's fine to have normal shoes though, and open-toed sandals (I checked!) this summer. We're going to buy some this week, if I can make time. She wants to see him every 6 months, so we have an appt in October.

I have soooo much more to write about other stuff related to our visit to the hospital - we ended up staying 2 hours and had a great time! But it's so late and this was meant to be a quick ice-cream vent (!) and now I've waffled.

Before I go, though - I must use EVERY opportunity to catch up a bit on photos! These few of the boys are a month old now! I took some photos the day my mum came to visit, when we went to the swings. It was COLD! None of the photos have Nana in them, which I am sad about, but oh well! Matthew had his first go on the swings the week before that, and I took some photos of his second time that day! Here they are:

I have soooo many more photos that are like 3 or 4 weeks old! I need to get caught up with them soon. And a ton of new ones too! Will try to update again asap.

Friday, 13 April 2007

Easter, Meg, photos, and update about the boys...

Toooo late to update yet again, but I'm SO behind that I simply HAVE to write something! I have dozens and dozens of photos to post, so maybe I'll just post a bunch of those tonight and then catch up in a more wordy way another time?

Thank you so much for the comments after my last entry about the mouldy muffin! I felt reassured as soon as I read them :) And of course, Arthur was fine. He was also fine earlier this week when he ate mouldy leftover baked chocolate pudding (what is it with mouldy chocolate things in this house lately?!). It was WELL out of his reach, but yeah, he makes stepping stools out of anything and then climbs. It wasn't horribly mouldy, but Neil said it had some on it. *sigh*

Arthur had a temperature last night though. I am totally confused about it, because he's otherwise okay. And we have had NO contact with other kids lately. He had had outings, but lately only to the park, not even the type of park with swings and stuff. Just for walks in the park. He hasn't even touched things like gates or door handles or shopping trolleys at the supermarket, etc. So it can't be viral. Well, Meg did come round this week - yay! But I phoned her last night to check (I'm so paranoid, haha!) and she's healthy and fine :) So it's weird.

Yesterday he looked kind of tired and sometimes a bit pale, although he DOES look like that sometimes these days. I put it down to his diet (STILL not eating anything I cook for him), but he seems healthy and energetic otherwise. So I asked him a few times yesterday if he felt okay, and he said yes and played actively, etc. About mid-afternoon, I put my hand on his forehead and just instinctively knew he wasn't right. I was SO surprised when I took his temperature and it was normal! Even so, his forehead just didn't feel "right" to my hand. At bedtime I couldn't bear the zing of that mother's gut instinct feeling in my bones any longer, so I took his temperature again, and it was 100.2. Ha! I knew it! I felt soooooooooo proud of my mother's instinct being all functional! I still sometimes can NOT believe I have children now, that I'm actually someone's MOTHER, and that I really do have such things as a mother's instinct! I'm always amazed when I experience an example of it, and it reminds me afresh that I Am Mummy. Which is so precious and wonderful!

Arthur said he was okay though, again. He said he didn't hurt anywhere, even his teeth or his tummy, etc. He said, "No, I not feel poorly, Mummy" and even, "No, I not tired - I alwight!", so I couldn't figure it out. He did SEEM a little off to me though, and he went to sleep unusually fast while still on the breast, at bedtime, which NEVER happens, ever. He was restless in his sleep, and I worried half the night (tsk, I'm just like that), because I didn't know what was up and I hate to not know, especially when I could pretty much (ish) rule out something viral.

I felt his forehead several times over the night and he seemed to get cooler, not warmer. We didn't give him anything for his fever at all. I figured unless it was HIGH, it was probably better to let his body do what it was doing, to fight whatever it was trying to fight. He woke around 4am and told Neil his tummy hurt, but then he sat up and said, "But I just need to burp..." hehe! And he did too! ;) This morning he ate breakfast well, acted normal, and said he felt fine. His forehead still felt "not right" to me during the morning, but his temperature was normal. And later in the day I didn't get that feeling when I put my hand on his forehead so I guess whatever it was has gone now. What was it?! It just seems weird. He has never (ever) had fevers with teething, so surely it can't be that after allll the teeth he's had. The only unusual symptoms he's had at the time of his temperature being elevated were teething ones though. He was chewing his WHOLE hand (shoved into his mouth up to the wrist!) like crazy, almost absentmindedly. He had teeth marks in his knuckles. I kept asking him if his teeth were hurting him, but he kept saying no - which was odd, because he usually answers yes if he has any teething pain. He said he didn't hurt anywhere at all.

Tonight I checked his teeth while I was helping him brush them, and he has pretty much completed his bottom two 2-year-old molars now. One is completely in, and the other one almost completely. There's almost no sign at all of the top two coming, but I wondered if I saw a slight grey mark on his gum over the top right one.... That grey mark might turn into the typical "eroded" patch that usually precedes his actual new teeth by about 3 days. One new thing that I DID notice though, was behind his new bottom 2-year-old molars, there's suddenly a hugely raised new area of gum with hard white pressure marks under them - his SIX-year-old molars!!! I can almost see the shape of them under the gum, and they feel awfully close to the surface, especially the back ends of them. I am SURE they weren't there the last time I looked at his teeth. Could they just be getting into place? I have no experience with kids beyond age 2, obviously! Anyone with older kids who know whether it's normal to get signs of the 6-year-old molars yeeeears before they come through?

Arthur has ALWAYS been one to teethe (symptom-wise) for miserable ages before his actual teeth appear, poor thing! He started needing pain relief and teething rings for teething symptoms at ELEVEN WEEKS old, and didn't cut his first tooth till 8 and a half months! He teethed awfully, almost continually through that whole time. It wasn't even as simple as just drooling and biting on things. I remember him have patches (maybe a few days at a time) where he would get flaming swollen cheeks and cry all day and night, and need Calpol round the clock every month or two, the first one being when he was 3 months old! We always thought it MUST be a tooth coming at last, but no. Poor love, and all his suffering didn't even seem to have a point to it, as it was still many months before he got a tooth! So with that in mind, could he be unfortunate enough to get discomfort from the VERY "pre" rumblings of teeth that aren't set to arrive for years? I don't know if it's possible, but Arthur has such a bad run with teething that I just wonder...

Oh, I just realised I'm kind of behind on some general updatey things here. I had a chemical pregnancy (ultra early miscarriage) last Thursday. Thoughts about it are over at my Pregnancy Diary as that's all I want to say about it here. But then Neil had 4 days at home over the Easter weekend - Good Friday, the weekend, and then Easter Monday. Which worked out wonderfully for me - not in a holiday sense though, because I was feeling weirdly physically ill after getting my period. I couldn't even lift Matthew without feeling dizzy and shaky, and I had to nap and stay in bed a lot. Thank goodness Neil was home, as it took me till the end of Monday to be able to do anything without coming over funny.

Anyway so that was our Easter! Poor Neil had a LOT on with the boys as I wasn't up to my normal stuff, though I did a lot of breastfeeding as normal! We really don't do a THING for Easter anyway, so it didn't matter, but the long weekend would have been nice to enjoy together. I'm always amazed to read American diaries and message boards around Easter, because it's so alien to our concept of Easter over there! When I was little, we used to get Easter eggs (chocolate, that is) from family members. Grandparents would bring them over maybe during the week before Easter, and my brother and I would be tormented by them sitting in a tantalizing way up on an out-of-reach shelf until Easter Sunday, as we weren't allowed to eat them till then! But that was it. I was not brought up in a Christian family, so we didn't do anything remotely religious about Easter either.

Once or twice, my mum made Simnel cake, and some years she helped my brother and I make Easter-ish things to eat when we got bored during the school holidays, like shredded wheat chocolate nests with a couple of mini chocolate eggs in them! But no actual traditions. We did sometimes have a big roast dinner on Easter Sunday - one year we had been in the States over Christmas so we'd missed our traditional British Christmas turkey dinner! So we had that at Easter instead :)

When I was very little, like under 7, we sometimes went to stay at a very old thatched cottage in Gloucestershire that my grandparents used to own. It had a huge rambling country garden with all sorts of nooks and cranies, and my grandparents used to hide eggs for us to find. It was such a charming little tradition! I would love to continue it, but I don't want to change it at ALL from how it was when I was tiny, and I'm not sure if I can replicate the details. The eggs were tiny chocolate eggs, the type that are wrapped in shiny foil of all different colours. So they caught the eye like little treasures, and they were hard to find - that was the point. Also, they were left by fairies. I am thinking that the Easter Bunny is an entirely American tradition - but I might be wrong. I just have no recollection of it in my childhood. But I'm pretty sure "Easter" fairies were not any sort of tradition either! ;) Those were specific to my family, I think. And they weren't Easter fairies. Just fairies.

It was SO exciting to go looking for the eggs on Easter morning! It would take a while because fairies do not leave them out for all to see! That made it so much fun. LESS fun for a significantly younger person with an older sister, I think! Sometimes my grandparents laid out a seperate lot for my brother, as it wasn't that fair with him being so much littler and me being so much more able to find the eggs than he was! We knew it was them laying them out, but it was fun to pretend/imagine that they were left by fairies! They were small and shiny and beautiful, so it was easy to imagine...

I would find one in the crook of a branch in a small tree. Or in a hole in an old tree trunk. Hedges were places that fairies liked to go, as they could be well-hidden there, so we would look extra carefully there (and usually find some eggs!). Fairies also like shaded streams and brooks, and our cottage garden had a beautiful stream (with trout!) running through it, with a little wooden bridge over it and weeping willows shading it all the way down. It was pretty magical under those willows with the sound of the water chattering away as it ran along, at ANY time of year, but you could practically SMELL fairies in there if it was Easter and you were 6 years old. We always had to be careful near the stream because Grandoug told us that about a Century ago (or maybe longer?), one of the 15 children who lived at the cottage drowned in the stream. That always stuck in my mind, but that was a good thing, as it reminded me to be careful.

Anyway. The fairies would also leave the shiny little eggs in nests and bird houses (always unused!), and little holes and nooks that were WAY out of a child's reach. We could see them from the ground, and they looked like just the kind of place that a fairy might leave a treasure. So I would ask Daddy to lift me up so I could see in, and sometimes the places were so high that he had to hold me as high as his arms could stretch over his head, but there was always an egg in a place that made me think a fairy might have been there :) It was just like MAGIC to see one in such a place. I can remember gasping at the sheer wonder of seeing it, and not being able to breathe again till the moment passed. The whole air seemed to tingle with fairy dust or something, hehe! Anyway, it was the MOST fun, and I would love to recreate it for my little ones. Not so easy without really "fairy-ish" places to hide eggs though. A big part of the charm for me was the old-fashionedness of it - the countryside hiding places and not a square inch of concrete, plastic or brickwork in sight. But maybe that won't matter to our little ones? Anyway.

So that is how we used to celebrate Easter when I was little. Only at the cottage when my grandparents were with us though. At home we would just have a couple of big Easter eggs to eat on the Sunday. I don't think it's ever been "done" here to give gifts at Easter, as I had no concept of such a thing as gifts at Easter until recently. The only gift times of year here were Christmas and birthday. There weren't even small gifts on any other occasion. I still keep feeling amazed when I see on the message boards I go to, the US families pretty much buying their kids gifts at a holiday almost on a bi-monthly basis, what with Christmas, Valentine's, Easter, etc! I TOTALLY am not out to offend anyone, and I know that lots of Americans read my diary, but I have to say that it seems nuts to me! I'm sure it's fun for the kids to have lots of opportunities to get gifts though. It's just so different here, even with the same actual holidays being recognised on the calendar. It's interesting how different cultures do things differently.

Soooo, Easter... I can't think where my point was going originally! Oh, I remember - it was that we did nothing for Easter, but it's not actually a big deal because we don't actually DO anything for Easter anyway. It just would have been nice to enjoy the long weekend if I had been feeling okay!

Then on Tuesday, Neil went back to work, and Meg came to visit! Yay! She stayed from about 11am till somewhere after 6pm and was a great help entertaining the little boys and just being someone to chat to! And she brought me LUNCH - homecooked lunch! It was chicken and pasta bake, and totally yummy! AND she brought an After Eights Easter egg for me and Neil - our ONLY Easter egg this year, well, except for the enormous quantity of Cadbury's Creme Eggs that I've been steadily polishing off since about... oooh, February?! ;) AND she brought a mini tea set for Arthur! She read in my diary that he loved playing with Jaya's at Jove's birthday party, and was thoughtful (and generous!) enough to buy him one! I had actually been meaning to go out and buy one last week before I felt too grim and didn't get around to it. How lovely that she turned up with one just days later! He loves it, of course! Matthew likes to chew it. And chew it. And also he really enjoys chewing it. But Arthur does cooking with it and serves cups of tea to us and everything! Thank you Meg!! :)

We went on a short walk to the park late in the afternoon, and saw some ducks and dogs and diggers (?!), and Arthur walked up and down a hill while Meg and I sat on the slope of it with Matthew. It turned out to be Matthew's FIRST time sitting on grass! That sounds craaaazy since he's 9 months old, but it's been winter for at least 6 months already, and before that he wasn't sitting, so... He seemed eager, but it only took him about 30 seconds (if that!) before he ate a lump of mud, so that was the end of that, for that occasion! He was NOT pleased to be removed from the grass, poor love!

Matthew is standing for 5+ seconds now, without holding onto anything. He is also cruising at sort of a "run" this week, haha! He seems to be practising it, as he does it purposely without any particular reason for doing it. He can go very fast along the sofa like that. He seems to just take 4 or 5 huge "running" side-steps to zip along the 3-seater sofa! He squats to pick things up, holding onto something with one hand while he does so, and he doesn't wobble any more when he does that. He can reach up and to the side to get something from a previously out-of-reach spot, by standing on his tippy-toes and raising the opposite foot right off the floor as he leeeans out to reach the item with his hand. He claps all the time and has now started waving. He doesn't wave daintily with his wrist - he is a "shoulder waver", hehe! His whole arm flaps up and down with some vigour! ;)

Matthew understands some words which I can tell by his response - If I ask him, "Matthew, can you clap?!" without any sort of change to my physical actions, he instantly gets an "I know what you're talking about" look in his eye, drops the toy he's holding, and starts to clap enthusiastically. He is the same when I ask him, "Can you dance?" - he immediately gets a cheeky little smile on his face and starts a careful bop-bopping up and down at the knee :) He spontaneously "dances" like that to music on the TV or stereo, if it's bouncy and catchy enough. Sometimes he nods his head to the music along with the bopping-knee thing, which is very cute!

It has now been a full week since he has stopped waking during the evening to breastfeed. I don't even know why he stopped, he just did! He used to wake somewhere between 10 and 11pm without fail, every evening, and I'd nurse him. After that it was pretty much 2-hourly - somewhere between 12 and 12.30, then somewhere between 2 and 3, then again between 5 and 6 (the longest gap). If he woke at the 5am end of that patch, he would nurse back to sleep till maybe 6.30 or 7am, but if it was the 6am end, he would be up for the day.

For about a week now, he has been waking as usual at the somewhere-after-midnight time to nurse, but completely missing out the evening session. Then 3 nights ago he ONLY woke at the midnight slot, and then not again till about 5.30am! And then he was back to sleep till 7am! Wow! I was too tired to know much about it, to be honest, so it didn't feel much different for me. The next night, the same thing happened. He woke at 12.45am and then not until 6.15, when he was up for the day. I immediately wanted to write about it here, not least because when I do that, it tends to mean that it STOPS happening, hehe! And I couldn't believe it was really going to continue, so I wanted to get it over and done with before I got my hopes up too much! Anyway, last night he woke twice - at 12.30ish and then again at 3ish I think. But still, that's a huge improvement on what was the absolute NORM until last week - FOUR wakings over his 11 hour night. I didn't mind them a bit. I feel vaguely excited about the prospect of him starting to sleep longer blocks, but it seems really weird that it doesn't feel like it matters a bit to me. I am SO used to multiple night-wakings, for 2 and a half years (without a break) now, that I feel like my body doesn't care that much about it any more. I feel just as exhausted, perhaps oddly MORE so, when I wake after a night with longer blocks of sleep. Since it doesn't matter to me whether Matthew continues to wake me frequently or not, the only significant thing I'm left with is a sense of SADNESS that he is dropping his night feeds! I cherish every single one, and I'll miss them. A full night's sleep really should feel like a much-longed-for luxury, but it doesn't feel that thrilling actually. Maybe I'm just crazy?! It's no big deal. I'm so incredibly sleep-deprived now that it would probably take me YEARS of good nights to repay alllll that sleep-debt, so it's not like I'll feel all that refreshed for unbroken sleep for ages yet. So there's no instant gratification. All that remains is a sense of loss - a cherished time that I can never get back. Something that reminds me I have to let my babies go and grow up, BEFORE I'm ready to! *sigh*

Anyway. It IS good news if he is spontaneously cutting out some of his night wakings. As and when I get pregnant again, I know my exhaustion will reach a whole new level and I will need to night wean like I had to with Arthur. I HATE night weaning my children. I hate any sort of weaning that isn't entirely their decision. And, since neither of my kids have decided to do any sort of weaning yet, I haven't even experienced that, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to hate it even when THEY decide to wean! I love breastfeeding them soooooo much, and I love the bond I have with them while I'm still doing it. I know there are other ways for a mother to be close to her children, especially as they get older, but there is nothing like a breastfeeding bond, and I'll hang onto mine for as long as they'll let me, thanks! ;)

I haven't really talked much about things that Arthur is doing or saying here, but it's way too late to start that now. I'll have to try and remember it all for another time. I MUST post some photos before I go, or there will be another huge backlog! There are too many now, as it is!

Okay, I have a huge set of photos to post, all from one occasion. The boys are still increasingly playing together, and having SO much fun with each other! They are starting to do rough and tumble play, which scares me silly as they are always coming within millmetres of cracking their skulls together, but almost all of the time they manage to miss each other, and they do sooooo much cute giggling and squealing during the whole game that it is worth the adrenaline rushes it gives me! ;) Matthew's favourite place these days is the sofa. He doesn't care if Arthur plays with him or not, he just gets stuck in, throwing himself about - backwards, sideways, forwards - just like a sack of potatoes, as heavily as possible for the maximum fun-factor, it seems! He giggles and squeals at his own game, even without Arthur's involvement! Matthew is about the most playful baby I have ever met. I thought Arthur was playful, but Matthew is noticably more so than Arthur was at his age. It's not just that he has an older brother to play with - half his "games" are things he initiates and plays on his own, without input from anyone else. He is great at self-play already.

Anyway, so one time the boys were throwing themselves around on the sofa and laughing and squealling and having so much fun, and so I took photos :) They also do a fair bit of gentle wrestling-type-behaviour as part of this kind of game, where Arthur stands rather threateningly over Matthew once Matthew's thrown himself down and landed on his back, looking up at Arthur. Matthew loves this! Then Arthur pretty much throws himself down on top of (or next to) Matthew! And hugs his head and stuff. Matthew loves it. It usually turns into very cute cuddles and even kisses from Arthur sometimes - he loves his brother soooo!

Here are the (many!) photos!

See all his FOUR teeth in the last photo?! No visible signs of any new ones coming, but he is very bitey/drooly/fussy at the moment in the day, so who knows.

Tomorrow I will have a TEN-MONTH-OLD baby again! I can't believe how fast that has come round. Arthur was 10 months old when I got pregnant with Matthew, and in so many ways that feels like just yesterday. Especially when I look in my diary or at photos of Arthur, and see what he was doing then. It just seems soooo recent! And here I am AGAIN with a cute little 10-month-old boy bean! I am so blessed :) It just seems crazy that Matthew is 10 months old already. Arthur had 5 teeth as he turned 10 months, and Matthew has four. They were/are both crawling and cruising well. Arthur was climbing waaaaay beyond Matthew's ability, but he had opportunites and we really haven't given Matthew any yet. We have started to let him try out the bottom of the stairs, but he is just patting his hands on the bottom step, not climbing yet! Arthur was literally climbing the entire flight at 10 months, actually 9 months even!

But otherwise they are really sooooo similar in what they're doing and "saying". Matthew's babbling is really changing all the time. His personality is starting to shine and we feel like we are getting to know him more and more each day, and at a faster and faster rate. He is truly blossoming, and it's beautiful to watch and be a part of! I wish I had the time to capture it more clearly here, but alas, my bed calls! Thank goodness it's weekend (lie-in tomorrow, yay!) but all the same, it's way too late for me to be up. I will leave you with a couple of photos that I discovered tonight and which surprised us with how uncanny they are! Our boys may be different in almost EVERY way to look at, but they are pretty similar in many other ways!

Here is Matthew, today, aged 9 months and 4 weeks, doing something he does a LOT lately!...

And here is a photo I came across this evening, quite by chance, of Arthur when he was 9 months and 3 weeks old, almost exactly the same age as Matthew today:

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

Mouldy muffin!

Darnit!!

Was (a bit riskily!) updating my other diary just now with the boys downstairs, and suddenly Arthur called out, "I eating cake, Mummy!" We haven't got any cake, so I ran down to see what was happening, to find him brandishing an almost empty muffin case with the remains of a chocolate muffin in it. The rest was over his face and the sofa, but I am guessing mostly in his tummy! He had climbed up to the kitchen work surface and opened a REALLY hard-to-open box that had ANCIENT muffins in that I had completely forgotten about. There were two left. I went in to check the remaining muffin and it has white/blue mould spots on it!!

Will this harm Arthur? Does anyone know? I feel so daft for leaving him downstairs for my own selfish reasons of wanting to update my diary quickly (as I've been to the doctor's today). Don't worry, they are now strait-jacketed in front of Thomas the Tank Engine while I whizz this quick entry off! ;) Well, not really, but Thomas is on and I can hear Arthur enthusing over it, so...

Do I need to worry? Urgh. My house is so messy and unhygeinic!! :(

Arthur said to me, as I picked up the little crumbs everywhere, "I been a menace!!" ;) Monkey-boy!

Tuesday, 3 April 2007

Photo update!

Getting soooooooo behind at this diary, but if you don't already know through reading my other diary, it looks pretty likely that I might be pregnant again! I am waiting to test, as it's still a bit early, and it is driving me craaaazy waiting. So I have been waffling about all that over there and thus neglecting things here a bit!

I FINALLY have some photos uploaded to post here! Lots though, but there are many more that were taken before these ones but which I still haven't got around to resizing yet. I do plan to post them all eventually though.

Me and my Mathsie-lamb:

Isn't he SCRUMPTIOUS?! I can't help being so immodest, haha! He's just a yumble-bip.

Being smiley at the park a couple of weeks ago (a rare sliver of spring weather!):

And tonight, in the bath with Daddy - this boy LOVES his baths! :) You can see some of his new teeth in these!

He's always laughing and giggling these days. MUCH more than he ever used to. Arthur was a giggler from very early on, but Matthew has warmed up to it. He finds everything funny at the moment, and I love the sound of his giggle more than anything right now! I love the shape of his sweet little cheeks and chin when they are squeeezed into the grin that breaks into a giggle, and how his eyes shine at the same time. I am just SQUASHED with love over that baby boy bean.

Pictures of Arthur too, in case there has been too much focus on my tiny man here lately! :) Arthur is mostly in motion, looking at something interesting, or vaguely annoyed that I'm taking a photo, these days!

Here he is LOVING a cat that was in our garden late one afternoon when he went out to play:

Unfortunately he is now TERRIFIED of that cat, because the next day when he was out there, it jumped up on the fence from next door - you know how they're all silent till there's a huge scrabbling scratching sound as they get to the top of the fence?! Well it scared the life out of him. He only calmed down when I shooed the cat away into another garden, and then he was happily playing when we heard the cat's bell on its collar jingling the other side of the hedge from where he was playing. I think from that moment onwards he felt "stalked" by the cat and it scared him to hear the jingle, sort of a warning sound that he might be scared out of his mind by the cat jumping up again suddenly. Also, that cat has been using our grass (such as it is!) as a toilet, and I am NOT pleased! Arthur can't play out there at the moment for the above reasons. Tsk.

Soooo, we've been going out every day this week! I have too many photos from those outings for one entry, but here are a few:

Arthur running down a slope at the park - the one of Matthew smiling in the tandem pushchair above was taken while I had parked him under a tree so we could watch Arthur climb the hill and run back down it! He loves running down hills :)

And contemplating the next hill!... (I can NOT believe I huffed the tandem pushchair up that hill! I was breathless for a while!

And lastly, being IMMENSELY proud of one of our big craft projects a couple of weeks ago. I figured he would LOVE it if I cut out pictures of cars from a car magazine that Neil had picked up somewhere, so that he could glue and stick them sometime. Then I suddenly thought of using black paper (we only had black card though) to make traffic lights!!! He is really into traffic lights at the moment, and does pretend play with his cars, saying they're waiting at a traffic light, waiting for a green light, etc. And he "drives" round the house on upturned boxes, stopping frequently at traffic lights! So I cut out shapes for him to stick on for traffic lights, and then went round the house finding different textured material in red, green and yellow for the lights. I used plastic bags, fabric, card, and tissue paper, and cut out circles from them. Arthur was so thrilled when I got it all out the next day!

I helped him make the two traffic lights, and then he stuck the cars in between them. He had the best time, and wouldn't put his creation down for ages afterwards. He wanted me to take a photo :) So I did:

He wanted me to put the picture on the wall, so I'm glad this has reminded me to do so. I put only a few of his best things on the wall, above his toy unit. He loves to see the things he's made, and he's so proud of them! I love seeing them too. I LOVE doing crafts with Arthur!

Okay that's all for now. I need to get to bed! I'll try to update again soon, even just to catch up on the rest of the photos before they get reeeally out-of-date! I'm updating daily at my pregnancy diary at the moment. I can't BELIEVE that I might be on the way to having THREE children! I just can't get my head around it! It's so wonderful and scary and exciting. And where did the time go?! Surely I was just stroking my baby bump with Arthur inside?! *sigh* It's lovely having babies....