Back again!
Okay, so Arthur didn't really get the concept of death (obviously) but he seemed quite happy to talk about it. I was just honest and tried to keep everything I said to his level (or as near it as possible!). He knows that Cameron was a little boy who was very special to Mummy, and that Mummy loved him very much even though she wasn't HIS mummy. He knows (after some persuasion!) that his middle name is Cameron and it was chosen to be his middle name because of the little boy that Mummy loved so much. He knows that Cameron died, and that means he isn't here anymore. I chose to tell him about being with Jesus when we die, in a place where nobody is ill or too tired any more. I told him that when he's as happy as happy can be, there's a place where he can feel even happier and that's heaven, where we can be with Jesus. He loved talking/hearing about heaven! I didn't yet talk to him about the possibility of people NOT going to heaven. I saw no need right now, and he's soooo little and that can come later. It's already a concept he can't quite grasp, just dying and going to heaven!
I also focused on dying when you get very old (except for Cameron) rather than all SORTS of reasons that people could die at any age (!) because I didn't want to worry him about anyone he loves randomly popping off and never coming back again to him! He's so little for all these concepts. He doesn't know that people's bodies are buried under their graves either. So far I taught him that the gravestones are markers, one for each person who has died, and I focused on what was written on each one - that they tell us about the person who has died. He's too little to understand in any case, and I don't want him anxious about these things.
We had most of this discussion just before we left to go to the cemetery. When we arrived and I parked near Cameron's grave, Arthur looked all expectant, and when we got out, he asked, "Where's the little boy?" Even after all that we'd talked about, he expected Cameron to be there so he could play with him (oh my heartstrings, how they ached when he asked me that so innocently! I wish he COULD play with Cameron and not just visit his grave). So I can't expect him to take in any of it really. But I'm glad to have given him some explanation of why we were going and what the place was about. He had fun running about with Matthew and it was a nice afternoon.
Arthur's behaviour is HUGELY improving with the discipline we're doing! People are commenting on how well behaved he is at church and also out and about like at the shops. I am now able to be happy with him walking instead of strapped into the tandem pushchair with his brother, because I KNOW he will listen to me and mind me if I ask him to stop, or come back. And he won't go away from me if I tell him he's not to. This is a huuuuge change - only recently I felt soooo out of control on this issue! It is definitely 100% down to the discipline, although Arthur does have it in him to be a really well-behaved little boy. He needed boundaries setting, and no nonsense over the consequences if he didn't stay within them, and for the consequences to be unpleasant enough to motivate him to avoid them in the future (!), and I'm so happy that we're finally providing that for him.
Jemma asked if I could talk more about the discipline, but the reason I didn't before is that we are smacking our kids (yes, Matthew too), and I allllways get negative comments about that kind of discipline. I don't care to hear them, so I don't bother discussing what we're doing in detail, that's all! I will happily share what we’re doing though, since you asked!
The boys have a specific place that they are taken to, to be disciplined. We call it "being disciplined" with them (eg. “If you ____ again, I will discipline you.”), not "you'll get a smack!" or anything with the word smack in it. They are warned once about something they are not to do, and if they do it again, they are CALMLY (big breakthrough for me with this method, hooray!) taken to the place we discipline them (currently just at the porch door in this house, since it's too tiny to take them to another room, which is what we'd otherwise want to do). What we have chosen to believe (here's the negative comment zone...) is that discipline has to be unpleasant if it's to work well. Yes, yes, I know a bunch of you STRONGLY disagree, but please keep that to yourselves. I'm just saying what we've chosen to do and what is working for us.
We get down to their level and explain why we have to discipline them (what they've done, reminder that we had told them not to do it and that they must do as Mummy or Daddy tells them), and then they get one smack on the bottom or leg - bare skin. I do not whack them with huge strength, and the method allows for me to avoid disciplining them in anger or frustration. They rarely cry about it though. Then I ask Arthur (or remind Matthew) why I have discplined him, and he tells me in his own words (so that I know HE understands why it had to happen). Then we always ask for an apology. Matthew is LITTLE for this, he's little for the whole thing, but definitely needing proper discipline for various things at the moment. He understands the whole procedure, and says, "Yeh, yeh!" earnestly instead of sorry when that part comes! After they say sorry, they are swept up in cuddles and covered in kisses, and reminded that Mummy and Daddy love them and we are trying to teach them to ____ (do as they are told, be nice to their brother, etc) by disciplining them.
The whole thing is so calm and controlled, compared with how I used to feel out of control and just fly off the handle so easily. We have persevered patiently with this method, and it's so straight-forward. It doesn’t take a long time, it’s quick and to-the-point, effective, and I particularly love the physical affection and reinforcement of our love for them. It always ends up with them happy and cheerful, just moving onto the next thing the moment it is dealt with, and me as well, which is a change too. More importantly, they are really starting to respond. They get disciplined quite a lot some days, and other days less so.
The amount they are being disciplined each day isn't the main thing, it's how they are responding to us. Arthur is acting with MUCH more respect for us, and seems more secure. He will do as he's told much more, and like I was saying about being out and about, I can trust him to stay close to me and do what I ask him the moment I ask it, when we're out, which is essential for safety near cars!
If he's really noisy during Big Boy Quiet Time, I will go upstairs and discipline him for that. Matthew is sleeping in the next room and I don't want him woken, but also I need to set up Quiet Time as I need it to go on, with the prospect of adding more little ones to our family. I figure I need to get the ground rules down NOW, right at the start! He always knows in advance that he'll be disciplined, it's never something that's sprung on him. He has to choose whether to continue a behaviour that we've asked him not to do, and get disciplined for it, or not! One time recently, I forgot to warn him at the start of BBQT that if he made too much noise he would be disciplined, and so when he made a load of noise and I went up into his room, I only warned him that next time if he was noisy I would have to discipline him.
He eyed me with suspicion as I was telling him, and when I'd finished, he said, "But Mummy, shouldn't you be disciplining me for this?" !!!! I didn't know what to say! For one thing it was SUCH a grown up sentence (he stumbled a tiny bit in the pronounciation of "disciplining" – something more like, “dis-per-splin-ing”!), but mostly I was just gobsmacked that he KNEW he should have been disciplined, and expected me to follow through with it! Now I discipline him the first time he makes noise during Quiet Time. He knows what he's doing, and relies on me to keep those boundaries well-defined.
He won't join in the singing at church, and I won't make him either. He has fun at creche, and the rest of church is currently for me and Neil - the boys essentially tag along. I won't push him to join in anything at church, although he must go to creche (or Sunday school, once he's 3) during the sermon. If he doesn't want to sing then that's fine. We are starting to ask that he sits with me during the worship time rather than running around all over the hall. All the little ones at our (very relaxed!) family church run about during the worship time, and always have. But I'm noticing that most of the kids around the age of 3 are starting to sit with their parents more. So we're encouraging him to do that too, now. He is doing great! He watches the band play and listens to the music and the singing. There are still plenty of occasions where the worship song will fade out and a little voice will ring out, "Is it finished? Is it creche time now?!" Hehe! He is also getting better at not saying that loudly when we remind him!
He does take in things though. He won't sing or do action songs at church (in much the same way as he wouldn't join in at Tumble Tots with the singing or group activities), but my heart soars to watch him playing with his cars and singing joyfully, "Our God is a GREAT BIG GO-O-O-OD and he holds us in his haaands!" :)
We are starting to work on "attitudey" stuff with Arthur, as there's PLENTY of it these days. *sigh* He's starting to respond, mostly in that he expects to be disciplined if he's rude to us, or shouts at us and stuff. We don't tolerate his whiney voice, but he still does it allll the time. There are still a LOT of things, but he’s little yet. The things we mainly won’t tolerate from little Matthew are high pitched screeching (in defiance, not so much for excitement) right in our faces, as it’s giving me tinnitus (I kid you not, my ears ring even at night after a day with a few of those award-winning screeches from Matthew!). It really HURTS my ears, and my hearing is numb for a while afterwards, so 15-months or not, he MUST stop it. We also warn and discipline for shaking the TV (he’s breaking it gradually), climbing onto the big chest of drawers even when told not to as he’s about to, hitting (Arthur or us) or throwing toys at people (!!). He needs to learn NOT to do any of those things, even this young. We always warn him carefully, on his level with eye-contact, in simple words. He pretty much goes back and does the same things again after he’s disciplined, but then he starts to get the message after a few times in a row being disciplined for that particular thing!
The battery is almost gone on my laptop and dinner is nearly ready (I decided to continue this entry while Neil was cooking the dinner after they got home - yay for a break for me at the weekend and my lovely husband!), so I'll continue this later after the boys are in bed.
Okay, back again! It’s 9.45pm – later than I planned, because I had an uncontrollable (!!) urge to make flapjacks. They’re cooling in their tin now, and I am sooooooo longing to eat the whole lot before it’s even cooled. *sigh* Here I am instead, though! ;)
I can’t remember if there was anything else I was going to say about discipline.... nope, my brain has gone blank. Anyway, it is going WELL, for us AND for the boys.
Oh, I wanted to mention in this diary that we went for our scan this week and found out we are having another baby boy!!! Yay! I am really getting used to the idea now (I actually thought it was a girl until the scan!). His name is Nathan Martin (Nathan – we love it, means “Gift of God”, and Martin – my daddy’s name). You’ll be hearing that name a lot here from now on :) Starting now! Nathan has hiccups! I can feel them blipping against the laptop! My bump is growing quite noticeable, but my energy is good and I’m feeling pretty good too. I just love this middle-of-pregnancy stage! I need to update my pregnancy diary asap (I’m 22 weeks tomorrow, and thus another belly pic is due!), but I doubt I’ll get that done tonight with the HUGE entry I need to write here first!
Soooo I have three little boys! I am so blessed!!! I can’t wait to post pictures of all three of them here! Arthur has some understanding about Nathan already, and his whole response is just wonderful and encouraging. He’s already a fabulous big brother, and I know he’ll be the same with Nathan as he is with Matthew. Arthur seems to me to be just made to be the eldest of lots of siblings, and I’m so thankful for that! I’m not sure about Matthew though.... We are praying about that! Praying for Matthew and his transition to come, and about his relationship with Nathan. I hope he’ll be okay and not find it too traumatic or threatening. I guess you just never know with each of your children who has never had a baby brother or sister before – each child is different and will respond differently to having a new sibling. Arthur may respond differently too, being older than he was the last time – I mean, he was too little to know much different, and can’t remember a time before Matthew was around. He’ll be 3 and a quarter when Nathan is born, which is a whoooole different stage, developmentally. I have high hopes though, for Arthur. I think he’ll be fine, and possible a wonderful steadying influence for Matthew too, as Matthew and Arthur have such a wonderful relationship and will have each other through a big family transition. It should be okay. I hope! :)
Arthur knows he is getting another baby brother, and that his name is Nathan. He is THRILLED, seriously! He smiles soooo much every time I mention it! He knows Nathan is in my tummy, and instead of saying, "Mind my tummy!" if he’s clambering over me, like I used to, I now say, "Mind Nathan!" and he stops and smiles, and pats my tummy :) He has been talking about Nathan a LOT int he last couple of days. He comes out with stuff from nowhere, so it tells me that he’s really thinking about it. He will tell me how he and Nathan and Matthew (still saying "Mashew" - so cute!) will all play together (clasps hands with glee, bless his heart!), and that he thinks Nathan (which he currently pronounces, "Nay-fan" or occasionally "May-fan") will really like such-and-such a toy, book, or rough-and-tumble game that he and Matthew enjoy. I tell him that Nathan will be very tiny at first and it will take him a long time to get bigger and learn to play the things that he and Matthew play. He shrugs it off and seems just excited about Nathan being around anyway. Which is lovely!
He said some stuff the other day which was music to my broody ears, haha! ;) He said, completely out of the blue, "After Nay-fun, then there'll be Beth-nee...." I said, "Really, Arthur?!" and he was so matter-of-fact - he said, "Yes." I said that we'd have to see about that, and for now there would just be Nathan. I asked him if he wanted more baby brothers or sisters, and he was SO enthusiastic and said, "YES!" immediately, and gleefully exclaimed things like, "Lots and lots and LOTS! And we'll all play together!" :) I asked him if Mummy and Daddy should FILL our little house with babies (hehe!) and he said, "Oh yes!" Not with glee, but with total matter-of-fact-ness, like that was totally something he would like to be part of. I love him! :)
He was patting my tummy this afternoon reeeally gently (I was lying on the sofa with my feet up and he was kneeling next to the sofa peering at my round tummy!). He said, "Gosh, that Nay-fan's getting really big already! Look at your big tummy!" hehe! And then he patted some more in silence, and looked at me to say, "I think Nay-fan really likes this patting...." I told him I thought he did too :) I announce it now when Nathan is awake. I feel him start to kick me after being quiet for a while, and say, "Nathan’s awake!" Arthur always stops what he’s doing and looks at me questioningly. I tell him that I can feel him bumping and kicking inside my tummy, so I know that he has just woken up! I can’t wait till he kicks me strongly enough for Arthur to feel it CLEARLY with his little hand on my tummy. He was too little to appreciate that last pregnancy, and I know he’ll LOVE it this time! Nathan’s kicks can easily be felt from the outside but I figure it should be really obvious (much stronger) for Arthur’s benefit.
We were reading stories on the sofa this morning when Matthew was elsewhere (napping? Maybe it was just after lunch then), and Arthur and I were sitting side-by-side as we read his books together. As I read him his Monster Machines book (one of his favourites!), he casually laid his hand on the top of my bump, while he looked at the pictures. I read on, and after a while he looked at me and said quietly, "I'm just keeping an eye on Nay-fan, okay?" Neil took pictures :)
I so love that boy!!
Well, time is getting on, and I have tooooo much stuff to write in just one evening/entry, not to mention a ton of photos to post, so I think I will try to think of some basic catch-up stuff about each of the boys. I don't think I've covered what stuff they're doing/saying/measuring (!) etc, for a while now, so it should be done now!
Arthur is 3 NEXT MONTH. Oh my gosh!! I can't believe another year has nearly passed and he'll be 3. Really. He wants a chocolate cake for his birthday cake, with chocolate chips in it, and lots of colours on top. I like the way he thinks, hehe! Last birthday I made him a chocolate cake in the shape of a car with Smarties on the top, which is pretty much what springs to mind when I think of his request. I want to make it different from last year's cake though, so we'll see. The choc chips will be different at least though, yum yum! ;) When I asked him what he might like for a present, he said he would like some "cubboard" raisins (yoghurt covered raisins)!! That's it! Although he seems excited at the prospect of his own camera, which we've suggested to him (I'm thinking of the Kid Tough digital camera - anyone know if it's any good?). I think he'd be thrilled to take his own pictures!
Arthur just got some new shoes - the hospital physio told us in April that when it came to the autumn (it's autumn, it's AUTUMN, hooraaaay!! I love autumn!) we should buy him some sturdy lace-ups instead of the velcro-fastening shoes he's been wearing. She said they would give his feet more support (they are still a little curly, hmmm...). So last week I got to thinking that I should get the boys' feet measured to see if they need to go up a shoe size or something. Their shoes fit on fine as far as I could tell, but it's so important to buy shoes that fit children properly for their feet to grow and so on. So I took them. My oh my, what a FUN FUN outing that was (sorry if my sarcasm dripped on you there!), but hey ho it's all done, and I discovered that Arthur had grown out of his size 6Hs that he's been wearing for many months. He is now a 7G (I'm always happier when his feet drop to a G instead of an H!), but that shop didn't have any lace-ups in his size. So a few days later we went to a different shop (seriously, we were NOT going to another shoe shop that same FUN-filled morning!) and found 3 measly pairs of lace-ups in his size to choose from, and a million pairs of gorgeous shoes that fastened with something other than laces, tsk! The lace-ups were not that nice either. The first pair (Startrite) didn't fit him well (he's been in Startrites for a long time so I was surprised), and then the Clarks pair was just tacky and horrible. THEN the lady brought out a pair of sturdy brown Timberland boots. They fit him beautifully, looked great (and I knew they'd go with pretty much every outfit he has), and he liked them. They cost forty pounds!!!! Oh my gosh. The sales lady was actually apologetic about the cost - it's way more than we've paid for his shoes in the past and we haven't got any money at the moment! But I told her we had to have proper shoes for him and I would pay with my eyes closed, haha! ;) Timberland boots seem to come up really small for their size, so he's in a pair of size 8.5 G!!! He has lots of growing space which is fab. Hopefully they'll fit him for a long time to come, and support his little curly feet well. Arthur has a physio follow-up in just over a week, come to think of it. It's every 6 months now. Wow, those last 6 months disappeared in no time!
Arthur has all his teeth, fully in, even the back molars. He can clean his own teeth well, but he can't quite make the brush do little circles over his front teeth - it's very side-to-side. But other than that he can do them really well. He brushes his own teeth and then I go over them quickly afterwards and praise him for doing a great job!
He talks non-stop. I can't think of anything he CAN'T say! He likes to sing a lot (except in an unfamiliar setting or when asked to sing!), and he is singing way better in tune than he used to. He can follow all sorts of actions to dances and things on TV. He does forward and backward rolls, which he taught himself many months ago, and likes to jump more than ANYTHING, on a bed or the sofa. He likes the trampoline effect and says (breathlessly!) as he's jumping that it's his favourite thing EVER!
He has crazy amounts of energy, but often complains of being too tired. He uses phrases like that for attention or to avoid doing certain things, sometimes. He reached TICK-FREE ZONE (!!) on September 27th and is healthy, so I'm praising God that he didn't contract Lyme Disease from that tick bite at the park where the deer carry it. I got a letter from the hospital to say they were aware of Arthur's case, but that they have only yet known of ONE child case of Lyme Disease from a tick bite at that park. Which was VERY reassuring! Phew! I threw the dead tick away - yay! :)
Arthur isn't really eating any better when it comes to my cooking. He loves jars of toddler food still (urgh, he's nearly THREE!) but rarely gets them. We keep some in the cupboard for occasional days when the entire afternoon has gone wrong (!) and dinner will run toooo late for the boys if I don't bash something together FAST. Soon I won't need to fall back on jars, because I'm really (really!!) doing great with FlyLady and will be moving onto the meal planning section soon - I already meal-plan pretty well (though I've been slacking since starting morning sickness a few months back), but FlyLady is helping me be organised so that things like that won't happen - the afternoon shouldn't go wrong and affect family meal time.
He does now eat ham (gasp!) but it has to be Bob the Builder ham. *sigh* He'll eat cheese, but only sliced or grated, and then he won't eat it grated if he's not in the mood for grated cheese that day. Cue MEGA tantrum if I mistakenly give him a grated cheese sandwich instead of a cut cheese (as he calls it) sandwich! He won't eat pasta or potatoes in any form. He will only eat rice if it's part of a jar of toddler food. Oh, and spaghetti pasta in jars, but not mine. He won't eat meat or most vegetables, so he doesn't eat much when we have a roast dinner. It sounds like it should drive me CRAZY but it doesn't, not nearly as much as it used to. I have no idea why he's not responding after....EIGHT months of just not giving him anything else to eat if he doesn't want what I serve him! But he's not. Anyway. He does eat sandwiches, albeit samey ones (marmite, cheese, that's about it) with the daily essential Bob the Builder ham on the side! He eats banana and apple, loves raisins and fruit yoghurt, and raw carrot. And sweetcorn, and baked beans. So he gets his fruit and veg, I make sure he does. He doesn't seem to go hungry.
He is still breastfeeding, though I have NO milk as such any more. I keep his nursing sessions very short now in the day. He gets the odd random one if he asks for it during the day, and otherwise his only routine breastfeed is at bedtime as it always was. He would happily nurse more, but although I am not trying to WEAN him, I am intending to cut him down a little before Nathan arrives. I am happy to nurse three, really and honestly. Arthur will probably only nurse at bedtime, and Matthew might only nurse at bedtime and naptime. I can't believe I am close to hitting the THREE-YEAR breastfeeding milestone!!! How awesome is that?!! I'm soooo proud. I am beginning to not really remember too well what it was like to NOT be breastfeeding, and I love that :) I would happily nurse for the next decade if I could!
Anyway, so Arthur is doing well. I'm not sure what other things I wanted to say. He is big for his age I think. I don't know his measurements, and maybe he's NOT actually big for his age, but people are always sizing him up and saying, "He's, what, 3 and a half?" So I guess he looks big for his age.
Moving on to Matthew!
Matthew is doing wonderfully! He is going on 16 months old - how crazy! He is teething at the moment. He has his four top middle teeth, and the bottom middle two, then he got his first top molar and the 3rd bottom middly on the same side, a day apart. He is working on molars right now. They suck and take SO long to come in! He has just cut his first bottom molar (the same side as the other recent two), and the top molar on the other side - just tiny corners of those poking through so far. So that makes 10 teeth for Mathsie so far! Halfway there! :) He has had a couple of days of being dosed with Calpol, and has been having the occasional HIDEOUS teething poo which nothing but an instant bath can resolve! They completely bypass pretty much any nappy I put on him, urrrgh. Hopefully he will get these molars quickly with as little bother as possible!
Matthew is finally growing into size 12-18 month clothes. Some of the more generous 9-12 month clothes are still juuuust fitting, but really I should put them away because they're not a generous enough fit on him anymore. Some of his 12-18 month clothes are just HUGE on him, but others fit well. He is in 18-24 month popper vests though, but that's probably just the cloth nappies! He is on the closest setting on size large Fuzzi Bunz, and otherwise still fits size 2 Kissaluvs, but only just. They are too low-cut for my boys really. Matthew only fits them this long because he's so lean and little! Arthur was soooo chubby! :)
I have no idea what he weighs or measures these days. There are no more baby checks after 8 months (crazy!!!) but I had that extra one at 12 months for him because they wanted to check his weight. He eats great (is starting to be slightly fussy about some foods though...) and HUGE portions, and is very healthy and active, so I never even think about his weight anymore. He is definitely lean and little, but like Arthur, people have started to assume he's older than he is lately. He has recently had a growth spurt (in height) so maybe he just looks tall for his age right now? I don't know.
His hair grows even faster than Arthur's and Arthur's grows FAST! It's still light brown, not getting any darker. It was a little fairer over the summer, though we really didn't have any summery sunny weather to speak of! His eyes are still blue, but have a yellowy hazel-ish ring in the middle quite clearly now. Sometimes his overall eye colour looks grey, just like mine. I am still waiting for his eyes to turn a proper grey, but maybe they won't? Mine were blue for a good long while before they gradually "greyed up" according to my mum.
I call him ever so many daft nicknames! I can't help myself. He's sooooooooo cute and scrumbly and that makes me keep coming out with cutesy names for him. *sigh* I'm hopeless like that! He is still mostly Mathie or Mathsie to me. I call him Matthew a lot though, too. For several months, one of my unexplained random nicknames for Matthew has been Matthew-Binks. Don't ask why - I really don't know! That has (of course!) morphed into all sorts of other nicknames, which both Arthur and I use for him all the time! The most common ones are just plain Binks, Binky, Binksie, Binksie-boy, Binksie-bean, etc. He is also known as a Binky-minx! Because he's just a bundle of mischief and playfulness! This has also translated itself into other nicknames, so he then became "that minxie boy" or "that mini minx". Which then gave way to "mini boy". The latest run of nicknames for him (though the others are ALL still in use, the poor child!) is "mini". I don't know why, it just keeps on popping out. He's just so little and such a mini version of a little boy. So I often find myself just calling him "mini" or "mini boy", or "mini bean". Arthur uses ALL these nicknames with ease. I sometimes hear him say to Matthew, "No, nooo, you mini minx! I know all about you, Binky-boy!" hehe! What have I done?! ;)
I just can't helllllp it. I look at him and suddenly my insides squoooosh and I want to squish him all up in my arms and basically just EAT him. He is so delicious and lovely! I love him soooooooooooo much. I hate (HATE) his cot bars at the moment. They are preventing me from being able to kiss his sweet cheeks while he's sleeping. Mind you, they are probably helpfully protective - he might get very little restful sleep if I was actually able to access those cheeks during the evening! ;) We are thinking ahead at the moment, about transitioning him to a toddler bed (perhaps the "bed" version of his cotbed?) or normal single bed before Nathan is born - the boys will share a room when that happens. Right now, he's not ready. But we're thinking on it.
I need a flapjack. Sort of like oxygen, right now :) Back in a mo.
Matthew's shoes were a perfect fit - he's in proper walking shoes now and I have been putting him in a pair of Clarks 4Gs that Arthur outgrew like 2 weeks after they arrived. All of Arthur's bigger shoes will not be suitable for Matthew, even if he's the same width foot and everything, because Arthur's feet are curly and have moulded the shoe somewhat. Also, I keep hearing that it's just not good to hand down shoes for everyday wear. Old shoes are already moulded to somebody else's foot and thus don't give the best support to the next person. Children need the most ideal support and best fit possible while their feet are growing and they're so active on them! So, yeurgh, expenses! But worthwhile ones.
I'm so glad that Matthew was measured as needing a 4G! The shop assistant checked the shoes for me, and pronounced them perfect for him, so I'm really glad. He loves his shoes at the moment, and is always bringing them to me to put them on so he can go out!
He is running now, having been practising it for AGES, back and forth across the living room, faster and faster till he would fall and then get up and try again! He can run and he's so pleased with himself. He has also more recently been working on stepping down from something (say a box that he's climbed on), forwards with one foot first, but without holding onto anything. He has had soooo many falls doing this, but he won't be deterred. He gets frustrated but that makes him all the more determined. He can do this over and and over and over for like 20 minutes without stopping! He is the most determined child I ever met. Although I think I was pretty much the same kind of child, so that's probably why! He has been doing this from when he was a tiny baby, first with practising to roll, and then to crawl, etc. Every gross motor skill has been worked on like this, and many of the fine motor skills as well.
Anyway, the day of our scan, my grandparents babysat for us while we went together to see our 3rd little tiny one! It was the first time that the boys had been left with someone without either Neil or myself for any length of time. They were fine - Granny said Matthew didn't seem overly happy about it just after we left, but they got the jigsaw box down and he was instantly fine :) Anyway, when we got home, Matthew was standing on the jigsaw box doing his stepping-down practise, and they said he'd been doing it for quite some time. He finally perfected it that afternoon! He can now step down off the mattress that is our floor-bed, any box of similar height - he'll even practise climbing on a book that's flat on the floor and stepping down off it! And he can do it smoothly, one foot first, without needing to hold onto anything. He is SO pleased with himself! He does it over and over, beaming HUGELY the whole time and looking up every time for approval and praise! He's the cutest pie.
He isn't saying much yet. I forget when to expect that kind of thing! There's so much variation, and I can't even remember what Arthur was saying at Matthew's age, or when he really got talking. I know he seemed to not be saying much when other toddlers were, but then he suddenly started saying a LOT very quickly, and left those same toddlers behind. I don't know if Matthew will be the same - every child is different after all.
He currently says:
Mama (but only recently and not very consistently)
Dada or Daddeeee!
Down (dah)
The end (dee eh) for the end of a story when I close the book
Doooo! (that's "moo" for a cow, bless him!)
din or dink (drink)
dindin or dinder (gingerbread man - those Organix gingerbread men are his ultimate all-time favourite snack right now!)
Boo-dee! (Boogie Beebies - a TV programme on CBeebies that he loves to dance and clap to and is very excited when it starts!)
Toh Doooon (Tommy Zoom, one of Arthur's favourites on CBeebies at the mo)
Ta (Thomas the Tank Engine - yes, too much telly is still happening at our house)
Tee! (teeth - he LOVES having his teeth brushed now, and this is his excited exclamation when we approach him with his toothbrush!)
Den (again)
Dih or didit (biscuit)
He says something consistent for "breakfast" but I can't remember exactly how he says it well enough to write something here
Same for "Arthur". It's so vague and changes all the time, but I know he's trying to call Arthur by name specifically. It has been "sur" or "sur-sur" or "ah-dah" before now, but never consistently.
Zooz (shoes)
I can't remember any others for now, though there might be a few more. Nathan is kicking me :)
What else about Matthew? He is ever such a rough-and-tumble boy! He is so aggressive in his play, it unnerves me! He loves any kind of roughness in play that's done to him, it makes him giggle like CRAZY. I have started to find it a sound that makes me actually unsettled if I'm in the kitchen preparing dinner and hear Matthew start to belly-laugh! I go quickly to see what they're up to, as it's guaranteed to be some sort of wrestling with head-locks involved, on the sofa, if Matthew is giggling like that! Funny boy! He LOVES to wrestle, and initiates it all the time with Arthur, who puts up with it very generously! Actually, Arthur loves to play with Matthew, anything that makes him laugh seems to make Arthur laugh too, even if it's not his best choice of game! Arthur prefers playing with cars and pretend play, but Matthew is always desperate for a game of chase, catch, ball-throwing, or wrestling! If Arthur makes funny faces as he pops out from a hiding place, Matthew squeals with excitement and laughs and laughs. They have invented some crazy games that make them both laugh a lot.
I took some photos one afternoon of some games they were playing together. These photos are probably nearly a month old now, but oh well - better late than never! The first game they played looked decidedly odd to me, so I asked Arthur what game it was. He said it was "biting noses"!! They never actually bit each others noses, just acted threateningly with open mouthes poised over each others noses, as though they MIGHT bite! It made them laugh waaaay too much to ever actually get to biting. They are such funny little boys!
This very weird game (!!) was swiftly followed by one where Arthur ran about the room with a ball wedged in his mouth, and Matthew chased him, laughing too much to really do more than a stagger. Then Arthur would stop for a moment, allowing Matthew to catch up and reach for the ball, before suddenly taking off again - this would leave Matthew giggling too much to move for a moment and then the whole thing would repeat!
Finally, the fun concluded with Arthur hiding behind various items of furniture and popping out with wide eyes and mouth at Matthew, who just stood rooted to the spot, squealling with delight every time Arthur popped out. He looks very still and calm but he's actually screeching fit to shatter the windows!
Here are my little scrumbly boys playing boats in the cheap boxes I bought from Homebase (to help me Fly!):
And here's a random photo from bathtime one night a few weeks ago. Matthew loves splashing! They don't have many toys in the bath any more because usually we're just trying to hurry and get them washed and out again, and also Matthew has started dumping everything over the edge of the bath onto the floor, never mind if they're FULL of bath water, so we have had to stop putting fill-able toys in the bath for now! Arthur HATES having his hair washed. He makes a terrible fuss about it every time now. We have a ring for him to wear around his head but he hates that just as much. Matthew isn't nearly so bad with hair washes!
Most often now, I am bathing the boys on my own because Neil is only home at 7pm or a bit later. I have adjusted to it at last! :) FlyLady is helping LOADS. I long to write more about all that but I just don't have time tonight. But I'm so proud of myself. The house is getting CLEAN and decluttered, the boys are eating, getting nappy changes, and sleeping on time, they get to go out every day, and by the time Neil is home, the house is that bit tidier than when he left, the kids are fed and bathed, and sometimes changed for bed too. Usually that's what I'm doing as he walks in, changing them for bed, although sometimes I'm running late and we've only just finished dinner (on non-bath nights - baths are every other night). Also I'm not stressed and snappy and at the end of my rope any more when he walks in, which is WONDERFUL.
Okay, I really MUST go to bed! I have so many more photos to post, but no more time tonight. I will leave you with a couple of photos of my little boys at the park on one of our daily outings a few weeks ago - I reached for my camera because I was watching them and suddenly they seemed so much like two little boys, not so much like a little boy and a baby brother anymore. They both walk and toddle about together, climb hills and roll down them! They follow each other about and amuse each other. I remember a long while back, writing here in my diary that I was so excited to reach the day where I could actually see them run about together enjoying each others company when we went out and about, and here I suddenly am! It was so delightful to watch them. I took a photo of them walking and climbing a little slope, my two little walkers! And then a hastily snapped photo of them sitting on a nearby bench. They only sat still for about 3 seconds each, but only about 0.5 of those 3 seconds coincided! So Matthew (whose 3 seconds started first) was already sliding his little butt off to go somewhere else, and Arthur was just settling into quick-grin-for-the-camera, so it wasn't the best photo! But it's the ONLY photo I've had of the two of them looking vaguely at the camera for ages, so I was glad of it all the same!
I have lots of photos of the boys each on their own, but tonight I've managed to post all the outstanding ones from my "The Boys" file at Photobucket (thank goodness we're having another boy - the name of that file could have posed problems later on otherwise, hehe!). I'll try to post those ones soon, before I have too many to post again and they get too old. I also have loads more that I wanted to write about, notably God/church, more about FlyLady stuff I'm doing, homeschooling, stuff about Neil's job, etc. And all my usual rambling thoughts! It's always good to purge those somewhere :) I'll be back! Hopefully soon!
