So. Very. Bad! Probably my longest break from updating my blog yet! And completely unintentional - just time ran away from me and I didn't get around to updating. I can't believe the last time I updated was mid-August! Now it's mid-October, and I have a LOT to catch up on here! I will have to TRY to make it as brief and bullet-point-y as possible, otherwise I'll do myself a disservice and stay up too late (yet again!).
Let's see, last time I updated, Benjamin was 13 months old. He has changed a lot since the summer, even though we're not really all that far into autumn (or so it feels!). At the end of August I finally gave him his first haircut! I was so nervous to do it because I just knew he would constantly be whipping his head this way and that, and trying to brush away the scissors or comb with his hands. So in the end, I nursed him to sleep on my bed for his nap a little later than usual so that he was REALLY tired, and as soon as he was asleep, I cut his hair while he lay on my bed! He was so fast asleep, he didn't even stir when I rolled him onto his sides to do the sides of his hair, or even right onto his front so I could see if the back was even, hehe! He had no idea he had a haircut and I kept all the cut parts of his hair between thumb and forefinger so that it didn't sprinkle all over the bed or him, as I cut it. I was pretty pleased with it, for a first haircut, and a lying-down one at that! Here's his "before" photo the day before (looking rather serious demolishing the clean laundry pile!):

And here he is an hour or so after waking from his "haircut" nap! Cute little manny!

His hair is ready for another cut now though. It's over his ears and down to over his eyebrows, so I need to get brave and do it again! All the boys are really needing haircuts at the moment, especially Arthur and Matthew, who had theirs done last before Nathan and Benji did. Must get around to that soon before I forget what their eyes look like, hehe!
Benjamin's personality and character have just been SHINING through over these last couple of months - more so each week that passes, it seems. I just love this stage of baby/toddlerhood! I am SO enjoying getting to know him - and he's a special little man for sure! Different yet again from any of the other boys. Benjamin is so self-assured and confident. He's very like Arthur in that respect, though he has also had the crying with strangers thing that most babies do (but which Arthur never did). He is still big for his age, and beginning to close the gap on tiny Nathey-noo, who remains as teeny as they come for HIS age! ;) He is verbal and physical, almost equally, assertive and lightning quick to pick up anything new and retain it for next time. He is absolutely on a level with his brothers, never mind the age difference, lol! No bossing this baby around - he holds his own and we are having to teach him no hitting, and enjoying some pretty assertive tantrums lately when he does not get his own way! He's such a strong little character, and I am so very excited to learn more about Benjamin as he grows older! I have a feeling he is going to be very challenging and VERY rewarding to parent and teach. He is also affectionate, cuddly and cute as a button! He snuggles frequently, still breastfeeds on demand during the day, and has recently nightweaned without too much trauma. NOT his choice, but necessary now, in preparation for the new baby! He has dropped to one nap a day, and on quite a lot of occasions has gone without one altogether. He gets too tired that way but still manages the day okay, and goes out like a light at bedtime whilst breastfeeding. His one nap takes place late morning at the moment, which is fine as it doesn't alter bedtime!
Benjamin is all about his FOOD! So different to my last toddler! He has been that way from the start though - my only baby to never choke on my fast let-down as a newborn. I remember being so surprised about how he somehow knew to go very still and let his mouth fill, and then swallow - how he knew to do that and never choked?! He also nursed without a break the night he was born. He didn't sleep or come off the breast once! Again that was a first for one of my babies! NOW I know him better and it makes perfect sense, lol! He can wake from a deep sleep and be eating lunch or breakfast (still swaying!) in his booster seat within 60 seconds! And eat WELL too. Nathan can't eat when he's sleepy, and sometimes it takes an hour or so for his tummy to wake up enough to eat. Benjamin is the exact opposite! If it's vaguely near a meal time, or he sees the kitchen gate open, even if we're still carrying him downstairs from his nap, he will immediately point and make urgent sounds towards the kitchen. He can eat a full meal right from sleep. He is beginning to get fussier about what he eats, as they all have after they turn one, but he eats plenty. He enjoys lunch and breakfast the most, and is picky in general about dinner options. I never know whether he'll eat it or throw it. *sigh* We are working on the throwing thing (he knows full well that he's not to do it, even at this age, believe me!). He loves cream cheese sandwiches and Nutella sandwiches, cheese of any sort, yoghurt and raisins, etc. He has supersonic hearing and can hear us quietly mention the word "Smarties" or "cake" even in hushed tones with loud play around him, I kid you not. He will drop whatever he's doing and appear at the kitchen gate looking hopeful, saying, "Gake?" or "Mar-bee?" (that's "Smartie", just so you know!). He adores the occasional treat of either one of those things. Right now Matthew is still potty training (starting to poo in the toilet, yaaaaaay!) and getting Smarties as rewards. Benjamin gets very upset about not receiving a Mar-bee every time Matthew gets one! ;) Full-on tantrum style!
His words are uncountable now. He didn't slow down with his talking at all while he learned to walk. He's walking EVERYWHERE and practising speed walking round and round in circles. He walks well in shoes outside, has begun to break into a funny little bobbly speed-walk in the house as he tries his very best to run about with the boys, and can pivot and dart very quickly in different directions during chasing games. HOW this boy loves to be chased! :) He's adventurous and a very typically rough-and-tumbly boy, and delights in being tickled, eaten (playfully of course!) or chased. He squeals and giggles the whole time. He entertains the other boys SO much now. They often just take a seat at the side of the living room and watch him for like 15 minutes at a time, just laughing and laughing at his antics and encouraging him to do more! They love watching him speed-walk in circles, crawl on hands and feet shovelling the ground with his forehead (I know, he's a funny one!), and pretend to spin around till he's dizzy by standing on the spot, swinging his torso about and shaking his head like crazy, hehehe! He's such an entertaining little boy - I love seeing it all emerge and the boys are having so much fun with him. He likes an audience, and the audience likes him right back!
He makes lots of animal noises now - my favourite is the sheep because instead of a flat "baa" sound like my other little ones used to make, he actually does such a cute little chipmunky "baa" with a tiny tremor to the sound, to make a real bleat!!! Sooooooo adorable, and I'm frustrated that I still haven't managed to catch it on camera! My camera batteries died (the small one that can take video) after his birthday and it has taken me till September to recharge them and use it again! Tsk! Anyway, he's fascinated with it and stops whatever he was doing to reach out and touch the camera or walk towards it, so it's hard to capture him doing cute things! I did manage to capture him walking at the beginning of October (a couple of weeks ago). I put a few little snippets of him walking together into one video. It was QUIET here while he was walking. One of the snippets was taken while Arthur and Matthew were upstairs playing (they are increasingly being allowed to now, so long as they don't get into mischief) so it was very quiet downstairs with just Nathey and Benjamin! The other times the boys were being unnaturally quiet - don't get any false impressions with this video! ;) They were reading and Nathan was playing with the baby boy doll that I dug out again recently. Benjamin LOVES that doll and gives it kisses constantly, calling it "beh-bee" (which he also says now when he pats my ever-expanding bump - so cute!). Here's the video clip to show you how well he was walking only a month after starting. I posted this one at Facebook already, so some of you have already seen it:
I so rarely see him crawl any more! :( He crawls when he's playing on the floor with the boys, but then so do they if it's easier to stay down there with the cars and Duplo and things rather than keep getting up and walking a foot or so and then getting back down on all fours again! ;)
Here are some more photos of Benjaminny from September:
With his brothers just before bedtime on the "temporary sofa"! We got rid of our sofa and armchair at last - part of my plan to maximise the space in the living room and improve the living conditions in there too, hehe! In the meantime we put a single futon mattress down and covered it with a blanket, so the boys could sit along it to "read" stories, as they like to at random many times a day. Benjamin has really started to join in with this kind of activity and turns the pages in a book excitedly, squealing out the few words he knows for the pictures he sees as he goes along, gasping with surprise at things, and pointing enthusiastically! It's so sweet! He wasn't doing that in this picture, but I love it because this is a snapshot of Benjamin's personality. He's so happy and mischievous and gleeful just about all the time, full of enthusiasm for life. I LOVE this little boy who is emerging from my baby boo! :)

Yes, he loves Nathan's monkey. LOVES him. Nathey is very gracious and lets him cuddle Monkey, kiss Monkey, hold Monkey, etc most of the times he wants to. If Nathan is crying about something, Benjamin will toddle over to him looking so concerned and serious, and bring Monkey with him, trying to press him into Nathan's lap or hands. Beyond precious, I tell you. I love seeing their hearts for each other even while they're still so little. Except when they're being mean to each other, of course! ;)
A random few photos of Benjamin playing - loving lining cars up and pushing them around like his brothers:

Something he does a LOT - seeing something out of the window and pointing (he uses his pointy finger much more now though. A month ago he would use his whole hand to point). He usually sees birds or cars, and points, saying, "CAR!" or "BUR!" and engaging me with this very look. He will repeat and hold his position as many times as necessary for me to actually pay attention! ;)

Playing with a sleepsuit on his head, for some reason! Another thing the boys love to see him doing! ;)

In September we went to Box Hill in Surrey for the day with Neil's brother and sister. They live fairly near to us and we all drove to one central point to meet up and enjoy each other's company and a nice walk. The weather turned out to be lovely, and the boys were very excited to spend time with their cousins (Ella who is now 5, and Emily who is 2). We had a lovely time, though I couldn't walk far without my pelvis hurting and my bump feeling too tight, so I sat down and took some pictures. I tried to walk with everyone because I didn't want to be a party pooper and sit out from all the fun activity! That evening I didn't feel well and had closely spaced regular Braxton Hicks contractions for hours. So I am not being very active now in my pregnancy (31 weeks now already!!!!) because if I do then I regret it - my uterus seems quite easily irritable this pregnancy and I've had other evenings after doing too much in the house since then, where I've had strong (even painful) Braxton Hicks contractions coming ever 2-3 minutes for many hours straight. So I am having to be careful and not be too active.
Here are some of the photos I took at Box Hill! :)

I loved these next couple of photos! The little ones were learning about bugs and insects under logs and bark. My BIL would roll back big logs and the kids would crowd round to peer at the little creatures scuttling underneath. They peeled back the rotting bark on a log, and I took a few photos. I found it so funny to watch them, because all my boys were, although fascinated, rather squeamish! They stood at arms length or poked with sticks, while the girls casually scooped creepy crawlies onto their hands and examined them on their palms in a very relaxed manner, hehe!


Little Benjamin sat in the pushchair for the walk part of the outing. When we stopped to look at things, he fidgetted, so I gave him my water bottle to keep him busy for a minute. (Oooh, Samuel has hiccups! They are blipping away quite sharply in my pelvis on my left side! I can't WAIT to meet this sweet little one!!) I took some photos of him sitting there with my water bottle:
There was only a tiny bit left....

But he soon figured out something he could do with it....

"Uh-oh Mummy...."

Sweet cheeky little treasure! :)


Little Nathan having a serious discussion with his uncle! They were like that chatting for such a long time, and looked so relaxed together that I couldn't resist a photo after a while.

My sweet little 2-year-old! :)

I'm trying to think how Nathan is doing - there must be some news to report since August! He seems so tiny and young still, MUCH more so than my previous 2 1/2 year olds have done. He carries his beloved Blankie and Monkey everywhere around the house, and is very attached to them, especially Blankie (a yellow cot-sized flannelette sheet). We have lots of Blankies so that's a relief, and they're easy to come by, but only one Monkey! We never take Monkey out of the house for this reason - he stays behind to sleep a lot, because he's the type of monkey who needs lots of sleep. ;) Nathan is fine with this, thankfully!
Nathey talks on a level with the older boys, uses long words and complicated sentences, and pronounces things well and clearly. But his voice is SO TEENY and chipmunky still!! I LOVE this about him! Any question we ask that requires a detailed answer (ones which start with "Why...?" for example) is met with a response starting with, "That's because...." and then a long explanation :) A month or so ago I noticed him talking with ease using various tenses in the same discussion, and I can't remember that from before so perhaps he had newly "got" that concept? He was talking about "he was" and "they were" and "we will". He has used all of those for a long time, but often he would get the context wrong or the tense wrong, and then suddenly started using them correctly this summer.
He has finally finished getting his two-year-old molars (no trauma whatsoever, weirdly!) and now has all of his baby teeth. He still drools and chews his fingers though, for some reason! He does not bite his fingernails, which his older brothers were doing by his age, so hopefully he won't at all! He is cute and cuddly and affectionate, and has the squishiest little round tummy I ever did squeeze! He can be very serious and if he sees other children messing about and having "silly" fun out and about, he will go very serious and quiet and not want to join in. He tells me they are being silly! At Box Hill, he was very taken with my BIL (Neil's sister's husband) and sat on his lap for ages looking at a stick collection they'd made, while the others ran about playing football and things. Neil's brother was resting on the grass with his hat over his eyes, and I heard my BIL whisper to Nathan that he could go up to Uncle Ian and tickle him if he wanted to! Nathan's face was such a picture, hehehe! He looked HORRIFIED at such an idea and insisted that it wouldn't be right to do such a thing! Funny sweet little boy! :) Of course right then, Arthur and Ella (the cheekiest pair of 5-year-olds I ever did see) ran up and BIL repeated the same suggestion to them. Their eyes lit up and within 5 seconds (no exaggeration), they were both sitting on poor Uncle Ian's tummy, working as a team to gleefully tickle him to death! Nathan watched them looking very unimpressed, hehe!
On the other hand, he is often the silliest boy in my house on any given day when we're home. He initiates silly games and puts on silly voices, does silly walks to make the boys laugh, tackles family members and plays lots of rough-and-tumble with his brothers, so I have no idea why he's sometimes so serious in other settings!
He is increasingly stubborn and tests the boundaries a lot lately, though it's just a stage he's reached more than anything else. We most definitely don't put up with that, but I can see that it's a stage more than emerging personality, if that makes sense. Nathan is very laid-back and quite shy. He still cries and freaks out if anyone unfamiliar approaches him to talk or ask him to do something he doesn't want to do. He is finally perfectly happy with absolutely anyone in our own home - door-to-door salesmen, family members, friends visiting that he has never met before, etc. But out and about it's different. We went to the dentist this week and he had a humongous melt-down when it came to his turn. We had been preparing him for ages, reading stories like "Topsy and Tim go to the dentist" (which he loves - he loves all the Topsy and Tim books!) and he knew a lot about what to expect. He watched me have a check-up, and then Matthew and Arthur being very good and calm having their check-ups (no cavities, yay!) and then when the focus went on him he couldn't handle it, poor lovey. He screamed like he was terrified, even sitting on my lap, and covered his mouth with both hands, crying that he just wanted to get out of here! So, no check-up for Nathan. Hopefully when we go back for another round of check-ups in 6 months he will be in a better place to allow that kind of thing! We took all the boys to the opticians for their first eye-tests today, and Nathan did the same thing there too, so we had to abandon ship for his appointment. Benjamin, on the other hand, walked right up to the optometrist, engaged him with babble, pointed excitedly at various things in the room and tried to say the words for them, and gasped with eager excitement when the guy handed him a little vision test card! He stared at it with bugging eyes for a moment, held in his little hands, and then looked up at him and said, "Guh! Doh! Gih-GUH!" If only he had the words to communicate, he would SO have taken an eye test today, lol! He's so confident and enthusiastic, and wants to try EVERYTHING and engage everybody. Soooo in contrast to little Nathey, it's funny. Not always ha-ha funny either - sometimes I feel a bit sad for Nathan because I don't want him to be overshadowed by bold brothers embracing life, both older and younger, while he struggles somewhat. I hope he doesn't find it difficult to see Benjamin really stepping out in this way these last few weeks.
I'm so grateful to my sweet online friend,
Grace, for blogging about one of her boys' eye appointments, and encouraging others to get their little ones' eyes checked and not wait! I had not really given it much thought until then, and I made appointments for them right away after I read her post. I'm thankful that Arthur and Matthew have healthy eyes and good eyesight for now! They are both slightly long-sighted, as the optometrist told me that young children naturally are until their eyes stop growing around age 8. They are both NOT as long-sighted as he would expect to see at their ages though, so he feels that it's likely they will end up short-sighted before their teens. I fully expected that because both Neil and I are really short-sighted and needed glasses around age 10-12 for the first time.
The only slight bummer was that it seems as though Matthew may well be colour blind. My brother is colour blind (red/green) and my mum and her sister are carriers (it's carried on the X-chromosome) - my cousin is colour blind too. Soooo all this time I have never known whether I picked the X from my mum that has the colour blindness gene on it, or the other one! And then having all these BOYS (boys are the ones affected, girls are only carriers unless they have a colour-blind father AND a carrier mother, which is rare), I worried that if I had that gene they would ALL end up colour blind or something! But, Arthur knew 11 colours with ease by 19 months old so I felt pretty sure he was not. Matthew was much later to be sure about his colours, but he can still tell me what's green and what's red without trouble. But then again, so can my brother.... Nathan has picked up his colours easily and younger than Matthew did, so I'm HOPING he is not colour blind, but it doesn't follow that he wouldn't be just because he learned his colours well or early. I had let myself become too confident that I hadn't got my mum's X-chromosome with the colour blindness gene on it. So it was sort of sad today when Matthew quickly identified the numbers on those bubble pictures when they were blue and yellow, but could not seem to see them on the red and green pictures :( The optometrist switched to mazes instead of numbers, for Matthew to trace his finger on (red maze on a green background, for example), and he couldn't follow the line :( The optometrist said that he'd see them again in 2 years and by then he would be able to be absolutely sure about whether Matthew is colour blind or not, but he suspects he is.
Soooo I did get the gene to carry after all, and I have FIVE little boys, all of whom have a 50% chance of being colour blind. They either take my affected X-chromosome, or the other one. Thankfully Arthur is not colour blind! :) I so hope Nathan, Benjamin and Samuel somehow defy the odds and can see colour normally. My brother reminded me on the phone tonight that out of all the genetically inherited "defects", colour blindness is the BEST one to have! ;) He says you never know any different, and the only thing it affects is career choices (same as the optometrist told me) - Matthew can not be an electrician, and he would find graphic design tricky, but otherwise it should not affect anything. Bennie has always asked us which crayon or pencil is green and which is red, if he can't tell. He can tell red from green but it's the subtler shades that he can't tell apart. Anyway, it's NOT really bad news at all. I wish he could be an electrician if he wanted to! Silly thought, but no mama wants to think her child must be restricted in any way, however slight.
They were such good boys at the dentist and opticians! Matthew was so brave and went first when Arthur would not at the dentist. I saw that he didn't want to, but suddenly he straighted himself up, puffed out his chest and marched up to the chair and climbed onto it! He made the decision to be brave and DO it, and I was so proud of him!
What else with the boys? It's getting way too late and this post is already too long, but I have just got SO much to write about, and I don't want to miss stuff in case I have another long break without meaning to! I need all this precious stuff recorded somewhere so that I don't forget it! Oh - Nathan has stopped napping in the day. He really still needs a nap. REALLY. But he resists it a little - not a lot - and then when he has a nap he stays up too late in the evening not able to sleep, and the accumulated sleep over the 24-hour period is actually less in total than when he doesn't nap and conks out within minutes of going to bed at 6.30 or 7pm! He only naps for an hour or so when he does, but then he's up at least 2 hours past his bedtime as a result, and gets up at the same early time as always in the morning. So we are just avoiding putting him down for a nap these days. If he asks and it's a good time for him to nap, he will go and take one, but that doesn't happen often. More often, when he DOES nap, it's during the afternoon where he lays himself down on the futon in the living room with his Monkey and Blankie, and falls asleep. Or while I'm reading him stories - again in the afternoon when he's tired. He IS too tired in the afternoon without a nap, and can get kind of cranky, but he generally doesn't fall asleep and manages okay. He sleeps better at night without the nap.
The first week or so that he did not regularly take a nap, he was pretty cranky and had lots of meltdowns. That week we were undertaking some big projects in the house like storing or laying laminate floor (that I won second hand and CHEAP therefore!) on eBay, or switching the boys from the smaller bedroom to the bigger one (I'm in the smaller one with Benjamin now) in preparation for Samuel's arrival and so that Benjamin can move in with the bigger boys soon too. The 3 older boys and Neil spent TWO WEEKS sleeping down on the living room floor on their mattresses while the whole house was in horrible disarray:

I did not cope with this at ALL well, hormonally speaking, and it's the only time in my whole pregnancy that I have had some major hormonal sobbing and crying, and feeling unwell and contracting regularly in the evenings. MUCH better once we'd finally got the floor laid with help from a sweet school friend of mine and her very DIY-handy boyfriend! And the boys' room sorted, of course, so that they could move back upstairs at night! :) So it was very hard for Nathan to get his naps while all that went on, and it turned out that he could manage the day okay and sleep well at night, so we ended up keeping him on no naps. I sometimes think we should encourage him to take naps again, as he really does need to sleep most days.... But the effects are just that he gets less sleep overall, so... Anyway, those first couple of weeks were quite an adjustment for him. He would have hour-long meltdowns in the afternoon, poor boy, and then fall asleep mid-tantrum or mid-snack. I sooo felt for him! But instead of falling back into his nap routine with great relief once everything settled down, he seemed to adjust and do better at night for it. Here are a few photos of Nathan struggling to adjust in those first couple of weeks:
Asleep mid-snack :)

At the table after tantrumming for one whole very very very long hour about the content of his sandwiches. *sigh*

Precious little lovey! I was reading him stories (he brought me a huge pile, something that he does many times a day) and when I finished he was fast asleep in my arm with his head on my shoulder! Neil took photos :) I love this photo. My hair wasn't washed and the floor was literally covered from wall to wall with toys and clothes and whatnot. The kitchen was in an even worse state, and oh probably fifty other things that needed serious attention. But here - THIS - here is what counts. Not the house. Not my hair. Cherishing the moment with my little children while I still have them with me. How I love it, and how I'll miss it when it's over. I'm so glad of this photo to serve as a reminder and a sweet memory all in one:

I have so much more to write about! I haven't posted photos of the changes we've made in the house yet, and there's plenty of that happening! I'm excited about it, because finally, FINALLY, we are actually dealing with the clutter we've always lived with, and down-sizing things, and storing things more efficiently, etc. I am so relieved! I so want to write about it in more detail, and post photos (which I haven't taken yet!) - you can see the new laminate floor in the video of Benjamin walking though. I also really want to write about school, though we've had a frustrating break that was not intended due to the aforementioned huge upheaval in the house. Matthew has not even started school yet and the autumn term for children his age who go out to school is already half over!! (I must not compare, I must not compare, I must not compare.... but it's so hard not to) I had so much I wanted to be doing with them over the autumn before we have a 2-month break when Samuel is born. I have lots of thoughts and feelings about it that I wanted to just sort of, get out there. And LOTS more. Neil is still unemployed - no income here for 7 months and counting now. We are trusting God! Neil is stressing about it somewhat, understandably, but I feel peace about it. And I'm so grateful that he's home to help me so very much, as he does.
I must update my pregnancy blog - I'm getting behind there too!
I made a decision to give my heart to Jesus, to live my life for him, 15 years ago this very evening, and since I'm here on October 15th writing my blog, I just had to mention it! I'm so very grateful to God for the grace and mercy He pours out on me every single day. He is so patient with me! I am as stubborn, childlike and tantrummy as my own children and He is the most patient, loving Father to me. I go my own way and take my own path way too often. I have so much that I want to work on and change in my life, but even so I am happy. God has called me to a work that He already prepared my heart to long for and desire from childhood, so I am HAPPY and glad and thankful that He has brought it to fulfilment! I love being Mummy. I'm in awe of God's blessing, and of the sweet little ones He has seen fit to bless me with - even me?! I am in His hands and cannot be snatched away. And I love Him, love Him, love Him.